I saw this post a couple of days ago and have been trying to find the right words to respond. I think many people struggle with the morality of swinging, or sex in general, due to their religious beliefs.

We’re Christians, as well. I’ve been raised in the church. I have several thoughts about this. Sorry. This will be a long comment. I apologize in advance.

One thought I’ve always had is that sexual intercourse and marital “rules” were generally not spoken about until the Apostle Paul begins spreading Christianity throughout the Mediterranean. Prior to that there are a few mentions here and there, but no real solid “rules”. Not even from Jesus. Jesus definitely never devoted an entire sermon to “sexual morality”. If he’d had, we’d know. There were far too many documentation’s of his teachings by witnesses at the time, for it to just go unknown. Instead, Jesus taught that the old law was abolished (the old law didn’t even spotlight sexual morality). Jesus literally came to teach the Jews that they had gotten wayward with God by focusing on rules and rituals instead of what God is really concerned about, which is the state of one’s heart. Do you love God? And do you truly love other people? Especially people who are different than you? These were the concerns of Jesus.

The Old Testament is filled with examples of sexual activity being recreational in nature, not just meant for procreation as the modern church would have you believe. There were orgies, incest relationships, prostitutes a plenty, and concubines upon concubines upon concubines. Modern Christians will try to convince you that all of this took place only because that’s what the norm was back then. Um, yes. And that’s what the norm would be now if you didn’t have the Pharisees arrive on the scene, creating hundreds of new rules for Jews to follow, just so they could make themselves look exalted for not breaking the rules that they themselves created.

King David was a man-whore who got his best friend’s wife preggo while his best friend was off at war. Then when David was scared the friend was going to find out, he basically had him killed. And then what does the Bible say about David? That he was a man after God’s own heart!?!? WHAT?!?!

Another thing in The Old Testament that modern Christians try to proclaim as legitimate moral authority is the “Thou shalt not commit adultery” command in the 10 Commandments. It’s right there with “Thou shalt not steal”. So to clarify: if someone comes to my house, and sees a TV that I own that they would like to have, and they take it without asking, then they’re obviously stealing from me. They violated the commandment to not steal. Pretty easy to understand. On the other hand, If I GIVE them the TV and let them have it, then it’s not stealing anymore. It’s a gift to be appreciated. Take the same scenario, but let’s make it my wife. If my friend comes over to my house and has sex with my wife without me knowing or giving permission, it’s obviously adultery. Thats a violation of the commandment. Pretty easy to understand. But if I give my friend permission to have sex with my wife with my consent, it’s STILL adultery???? It’s still a violation of the commandment? Come on! That doesn’t make sense at all.

So, Paul arrives on the scene in The New Testament, after Jesus’ ministry has concluded. Paul is a former Pharisee (of which Jesus took every opportunity to condemn, specifically for their ridiculous rules which weren’t important to God Himself), a well-documented Jewish priest who once had people executed for not following Jewish rules. The Jewish rules which were meant to exact complete control of Jewish followers. Just like The Roman Catholic Church did after its creation. Just like Islamic rules do. Just like most religious rules do.

So Paul shows up and now he is a changed man. But, for some reason even though God Himself never prioritized teachings on sexual morality, and Jesus, God’s own son didn’t either, Paul, the former oppressor, finds it super-important to create and enforce rules regarding who you have sex with? In fact, he goes on and on about it in letter after letter. It’s important to him even though it wasn’t that important to God! God is concerned with your heart. Paul was super-concerned about your genitalia. It’s like you can take the man out of the Pharisee, but you can’t take the Pharisee out of the man. Which is understandable.

If you ever met a military veteran who retired after 20-30 years of service, you understand my point. They may take off the uniform. They may now call their self a civilian. But no matter how hard they try, the beliefs that have been woven into the fabric of their identity for all those years still shines through.

It’s Paul’s teachings which inspired, and continue to inspire the modern church’s concern on sexual morality, what is and is not considered moral, by them, the church. At the same time they teach that all of life’s pleasures are a gift directly from God. To be shared with others and not to be hoarded for one’s own enjoyment. Got lots of clothes, furniture, material possessions? You should share them with the poor. Got lots of food? You should feed the widows and the orphans. All good things, of course. Got lots of money, you should share it with others. Especially the church! Got a high sex drive? Keep it to yourself!!! Sharing it with others will surely send you to Hell! And yet, nearly every major church scandal centers around sex! Preachers who can’t keep their penises out of orifices which don’t belong to their own wives. Or priests who prefer little boys to grown women! It’s almost like having sex with more than one single person for your entire lifetime is some sort of human urge that we must be born with. Yet Christianity teaches us (correctly) that God created us, and we are fearfully and wonderfully made! Except, God obviously messed up when he gave us these primal urges?!?! The same God that they say precisely and perfectly created the universe and everything in it? How can it be both? So God has the ability to create some creatures in the animal kingdom with the desire to only mate with one single other mate of the opposite sex during its whole lifetime (the black-browed albatross). Sometimes 70 years of life with the urge to mate with only a single particular other. They even go their separate ways for months and months at a time, then meet up together again to mate with the same other. They don’t even have the urge to mate with a different albatross, not even a prettier one. That same God created other animals to mate with as many others as possible (too many species to even mention. Just go look at your domesticated dog). So God has the ability to make us one way or the other. But the church (following Paul) would have us believe that God made us to be sexually attracted to damn-near every female that walks by, with barely controllable urges to hump their legs if they’d let us, but He really intended for us to only have one mate ever!?!!? Even though He never specifically taught us this. And THIS is the one thing that even church leaders can’t get right?!?!

Sorry bro. God gave us sex to be enjoyed. Just like everything else He blessed us with. And he gave us the ability and urge to enjoy it with others. Religion, throughout history, has used this one most powerful urge, given to us by our creator, and tried to control us with it, which has caused chaos and havoc. It’s even caused the most scandals in its own following. Imagine if sexual morality, according to Paul, hadn’t been chiseled into our brains, into our government oversight, into consciousness, into social acceptability, filling us with shame and disgust, causing us to hide, and lie, and sneak around to satisfy our urges? The one thing that every human on Earth has in common. The divorce rate would be considerably lower. The family unit would be considerably more connected. Public spirituality would be far higher. But all of the things that Christians say they are for, because the sinners are destroying it all, are directly impacted by man-made rules meant for control. Control that goes against everything that God, in all of his perfectness designed. For some reason this same issue causes the greatest amount of scandals within its own organizations. Making it horribly difficult for non-believers to take seriously.

Just my thoughts. Sorry to take so much space. I’m just sick of this religious nonsense. Go enjoy yourself. In whatever way makes you feel wonderful. At the same time, work on your heart so that you only love God more by loving other people more. Which is what Jesus taught. That CAN’T be a sin! Even if a Pharisee told you it was.

Funny how a man can get on a plane and fly to another country, any country in the world for that matter, where he doesn’t understand the same currency, religion, language, or culture as the locals. And yet he can somehow be sexually attracted to a female of that land, and she can be attracted to him, and they’ll have sex as soon as they get tho opportunity, But that’s not God’s design?! Just stop it already.