I’m looking for honest thoughts not affirmations or feel goods, I promise. My wife and I VERY recently got curious about the LS and decided to get on an app and meet some couples. We are on the same page in all aspects going into this, rules and boundaries are set and we were as ready as we felt we possibly ever could be.
The first week we weren’t able to make plans because of her cycle but were in communication with a lot couples that we liked and the whole thing had us insanely horny like all the time. Our sex life was good but since deciding to even start talking to couples it’s been like supercharged. We also decided to jump in head first into full swap / group play.
We ended up meeting our first couple who were nice enough to host us at their house. Honestly some of the coolest people we’ve ever met. Both were insanely hot, they were strictly no pressure, very fun to talk to and get to know and made sure to make sure everyone was comfortable every step of the way. Honestly it’s hard to imagine a better couple to introduce brand new people to the LS. We tend to be on the introverted side until we’ve had some drinks and between that and the nerves about this new scenario I had a fair amount of whiskey before we got down to the fun.
Everything was hot. Every single part of it. Even seeing my wife with another man for the first time which I was curious how that would make me feel once we actually got to this point. Im gonna summarize this part as to not write a whole erotic novel but to get to the point. Wives both start by giving me oral at the same time while husband was I think getting waters in the kitchen. I get semi hard but not fully hard. Which was weird because .. duh. He gets back and my wife joins him and we both begin to give oral to each other’s wives. Not trying to toot my horn but I consider myself very good at foreplay, oral and know the ins and outs of clit and physical stimulation and making sure the woman is always the first to cum at least once usually before I’ve even penetrated her.(I used to be cum pretty fast earlier in our marriage so I had to develop these skills to make sure wife always got her rocks off before I did) Plus I genuinely LOVE everything about giving oral but usually don’t get hard enough for sex while I’m doing it unless she is stroking or rubbing me at the same time. His wife came once during the first oral session then I asked for her to give me oral for a little bit too (this ALWAYS is the sure fire way to get me hard and ready to go) and for some reason it would get kinda hard but never hard enough for sex. I was so confused but tried not to let it get in my head too much and try another previous surefire way by having her ride my face while I ate her and tried to stroke myself. Her husbands been having sex with my wife at this point. She came again while we were doing that but still I was not able to get hard enough for sex and finally caught on it just wasn’t gonna happen so I encouraged her to shift our focus towards group play with her husband and my wife while they finished. We started around 11pm and ended around 3am. After everyone was worn out we all talked for a bit hugged and they said we were awesome and they couldn’t believe that was our first time (whether or not this was genuine or not it made us feel good lol) and said our goodbyes and they can’t wait for next time.
Fast forward to our meeting with a hot new very cool and newbie friendly couple a few days later, very very similar story. Everything was hot and but I ran into the same issues at the same parts. I got closer to getting fully hard but would lose it so quick. Once again not able to perform the main event. I blamed the whiskey and nerves the first time so I drank less this time and it still happened so the alcohol excuse was out. I don’t feel like I’m ever uncomfortable (until I became sure it wasn’t gonna happen but even then I just took up different roles to provide pleasure to the women 🤷♂️ and try not to let my self disappointment show) or not aroused. It’s bizarre. And again we got complimented “you guys don’t seem like rookies at all” and the wife even surprised me by very passionately making out with me in front of the husband after we were already done with the all the sexual stuff before I walked them to the door.
I developed a bit more of a friendship in our premeetup conversations with the 2nd couples husband and asked him for any advice on that and he said he and a lot of people in the LS take Celias or Viagra to ease nerves with other couples. So I am waiting for those to come in before I play again because it was taking a toll on my confidence. I’ve never had this issue before.
All that being said, I would like to know, from a wives perspective, how does it feel to go to a full swap with the expectations of being fucked and ultimately not getting fucked. Would you see them again if you still orgasmed from oral and finger stimulation? If so is the second time around usually better since we are no longer strangers and have a bit more of a personal connection?
Remember, I’m looking for completely honest, no matter how brutal they are, answers. I don’t want insincere affirmations or attempts to make me feel better while can appreciate anyone who would like to do that.
Ladies please help. 🙏
It happens to a lot of men, my husband included, until we started using trimix (it's a shot you take in your dick). The trimix has changed everything for him. We used to not have sex for a couple of days before events or dates, but now he has no worries, that shit works every single time (as long as you inject it in the right spot)
I think all the wives in the lifestyle understand that ED has nothing to do with us. It's just a man being on adrenaline overload, so it's kinda the opposite of him not being excited.
You might be the guy that recommended on reddit. If so, thank you, it was life changing
Super valid, I forget not everyone starts slow. If viagra works, use viagra!
45m here. I was having some problem as well, but never when it was just me and my wife together. Playing with others in a group setting can cause sensory overload and erectile issues. I got a prescription for the blue pill through Amazon Medical, only take it when we’re playing with others, and it’s worked great!
If the guy is skilled with his mouth it’s not an issue usually (I can get dick from my husband after their gone)
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It's a legit medication that's prescribed. You use an insulin syringe. It's a brief prick, and you definetly need to watch the instructional video, but it's a second of pain for a bone that is rock hard for hours. There is an antidote that they require people to get with it in case the man develops a priaprism.
It literally saved our swinging life. My hubby was going to bow out, he was having so much anxiety about if he could get hard or not, then someone on reddit mentioned this stuff, and it always works, and I think that's pretty universal.
He had tried viagra, cialis, and every over the counter he saw, nothing else worked.