My partner (M27) and I (F27) started as an open relationship relationship, we gradually started only seeing others with each other present (swinging). We have had a MFMF and FFM. I am not new to this lifestyle and really enjoyed the open relationship, swinging, and couple dating. I’ve never been jealous during swinging/threesomes, I find them lots of fun.

Having been apart of this lifestyle I know a certain degree of jealousy can come in and out and it’s normal.

There have been few occasions where jealously has come up on my end: - unclear expectations and boundaries - unexpected actions that imo cross boundaries

However, lately I’ve been super jealous of him fantasizing about other girls. I can’t watch p*rn with him anymore because I can’t help but feel he rather fantasize about the chaturbate girl instead of play with me. I feel more insecure lately and I think this plays into my jealousy. I’m not sure which came first, the jealously or insecurity. I’ve been so uncomfortable with this that I’d rather not do FFM anymore and just do MFMF so it feels fair, which isn’t a healthy way to view swinging so I’ve taken a step back until I’ve dealt with my emotions. We haven’t done MFM which may have something to do with my feelings but I’m not sure.

We have lots of love and care between us, and great communication. I’ve brought up the jealously before with regards to specific situations and we’ve talked through them.

I just don’t understand why my jealousy isn’t going away and it’s escalating. It makes me sad because I don’t want to be jealous. I’ve started watching boys on chaturbate to try and help break down the feeling that he’s watching girls but I’m not watching boys, but it just doesn’t really work for me :/

Has anyone else experienced this? What are some possible explanations? How do you deal with this?