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How did the topic come up in your relationship?
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Iā€™ve been married to my wife for 3 years and together for a total of 9 years. We are in our early thirties and both of us only have a body count of two each (including ourselves)

The older Iā€™ve gotten, the more comfortable Iā€™ve gotten with kinks and exploring with my wife. However I stumbled upon the swinging lifestyle and after trying to ignore it for the better part of two yearsā€¦Iā€™m curious.

Part of me think it would be thrilling to watch my wifeā€™s facial expressions when she takes another cock. Iā€™m the biggest sheā€™s had and Iā€™m average. I think it would be hot if she got to try a big cock. Another part of me thinks it would be hot if I fucked someoneā€™s wife.

My wife and I are very open with our sexuality. But this is a new extreme and Iā€™m not sure how to bring it up. How have you all got past this point? Also, do you have rules? Do you swing in the same room or separate rooms? How did you find your first couple?

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Glad you worked it out that she was not trying to replace you. But yeah, she definitely could have handled that better.

It all worked out. She originally stated that when she initially asked for FFM, she was making out with the other woman at the bar already. She assumed it would be the same in this case and I would go along. I get her point now, but wouldnā€™t recommend that people try it this way. Itā€™s also funny that I have more conversations with guys about hooking up with her than women. We get hit with a lot of emotions at times, but itā€™s what we choose to do with them that can change your whole life.

My wife likes girthy dicks and men that can fuck non stop for 20 minutes. I can't hold it for that long and I don't have much girth. She never had a one night stand, casual sex and slept with 4 men including me. One night after sex she just blurted out that she wants to start having sex with other men. I suggested swinging to her and she half agreed.

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Glad you worked it out that she was not trying to replace you. But yeah, she definitely could have handled that better.

It all worked out. She originally stated that when she initially asked for FFM, she was making out with the other woman at the bar already. She assumed it would be the same in this case and I would go along. I get her point now, but wouldnā€™t recommend that people try it this way. Itā€™s also funny that I have more conversations with guys about hooking up with her than women. We get hit with a lot of emotions at times, but itā€™s what we choose to do with them that can change your whole life.

Glad you worked it out that she was not trying to replace you. But yeah, she definitely could have handled that better.

It all worked out. She originally stated that when she initially asked for FFM, she was making out with the other woman at the bar already. She assumed it would be the same in this case and I would go along. I get her point now, but wouldnā€™t recommend that people try it this way. Itā€™s also funny that I have more conversations with guys about hooking up with her than women. We get hit with a lot of emotions at times, but itā€™s what we choose to do with them that can change your whole life.

We started with her interest in girls and it progressed to soft swapping. If your wife has expressed interest in girls at all (or even if she hasn't - mine never did) suggest going to a strip club - that's how we started. If you guys are that sex positive, that shouldn't be an issue. Use that as a launching pad by either getting a stripper to pay extra attention to her and see if it lights something in her (this is what happened with us). Or ask if you can get a dance while she watches and tell her later how much that turned you on and say you might be turned on by seeing a guy touch her, too.

(Edited for context)

We (46M/43F) ended up talking about it after meeting an attractive couple while on a cruise. By then, weā€™d already been playing a game we called ā€œWould I?ā€ where if we saw or one of us were talking about someone, the other would ask, ā€œWould I?ā€ meaning ā€œWould I fuck them?ā€ After meeting this couple, talking about them later, we played the game and we both said yes. Normally the game ends there with a giggle.

That time, though, she said, ā€œLetā€™s talk about that.ā€ So we did. And that talk turned into a years-long conversation. After that cruise, the world shut down, so we had plenty of time to think on it and research.

Weā€™re newbies, and weā€™re still in the ā€œdipping our toes into itā€ stage, having been to a couple of different clubs and having had a couple of experiences, but no full swaps yet.

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8 months ago