When my wife and I became wealthy we lost a lot of vanilla friends and lots of family and other relationships changed. My experience in the lifestyle is many are very much "keeping up with the Joneses" type and I'm worried that when joining the lifestyle it'll cause issues and resentment.
I've partnered with others in the lifestyle and they make subtle comments about my car or other things I say. This is just the women side and I'm concerned the husbands will be a lot worse.
Also I'm a generous guy and not trying to flaunt money but many times I just want to share experiences with others. I'll say things like "I have extra tickets to this concert wanna come?" Then they'll come, we'll have a blast and we'll never talk to them again.
Your generosity may come over as showing off. Maybe that's the reason why you lost much of your vanilla friends.
We’ve never asked our playmates about their financial situation, it’s one of our business. That being said…. Early on when we’d meet up for drinks or dinner with couples my husband would always grab the check and I had to tell him to stop because it could seem emasculating to the other husband. (Several times the male half of the couple would get annoyed, hand over cash, insist on venmoing, etc)
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