I grew up in a very religious household, so had mostly defaulted to monogamy throughout my life. One of the few exceptions was when I was 20, my friend and I (both male) hooked up with two women and had group sex with full swapping. At the time I was deeply ashamed for religious reasons. Part of my shame was rooted in the fact that I thoroughly enjoyed every aspect of the entire experience!

I loved being sexual in a group atmosphere, high-fiving my friend and cracking jokes with the group during the play! I loved complimenting the ladies and rooting them on when they gave my friend head! I loved being watched by the other couple! And by far and away my favorite part was swapping partners! We both fucked our partners first then switched after a bit. It was one of the most exhilarating feelings I’ve ever had and I loved every minute of it. I have fantasized about it ever since. However, my religious-fueled guilt always stopped me from pursuing the lifestyle.

Fast forward to today, I’m married to a gorgeous woman, but it’s a monogamous marriage. I have lost faith in the religion which has caused me to re-evaluate everything in my life including my sexual desires. I have finally opened up to my partner regarding my fantasy for swinging. Her response was that she is not interested in it, but she wasn’t judgmental at all. It still felt really good just letting her know about the fantasy and she has taken a couple small steps to accommodate it.

Since I’ve opened up to her she has incorporated swinging into our dirty talk. Her and I enjoy evaluating which of our couple-friends would be a smash or pass (not serious, just for funzies). She also wore some leggings that exposed her camel toe in front of some friends. I noticed both of my buddies checking her out, it was so hot! Just these small gestures from my partner have helped me to feel acceptance from her and has spiced up our sex life a ton! My only regret is not being honest with myself earlier in life. I should have pursued a relationship within the lifestyle long ago. Hindsight is 20/20 and none of this is my partner’s fault as I never spoke up until recently. I am not sure if she will ever decide to try swinging, but I am at peace with whichever way it goes.

Any suggestions about some things her and I could do to explore this fantasy further (aside from bringing others into the bedroom)? Is there an easy way to befriend folks in the lifestyle even though I am not sure if my wife and I will ever fully join? I believe that if my wife could meet actual swingers and see that they are normal people, it would help her be more open to it.