Obviously we can't avoid the one-and-done completely, mismatches happen, but today's posts by unicorns got me thinking. (Not to mention one recently about vacationing with LS friends - that's a huge compatibility test.)

Hubby and I have discovered we appreciate different aspects of the LS. I like group sex and the honest, semi-objectification nature of it. He's happiest when there's an ongoing connection, no strings attached. I'm definitely cool with FWBs too, it's just more difficult to find.

Details from a comment, and what I'd call a red flag, is a couple not talking privately about inviting an FWB to an event because their primary partner is disinterested. Determining a boundary by directly involving a unicorn is crappy. It could've been timing and excitement to blame, but hopefully a lesson learned for all involved.

So, for those of you who swing with people you consider friends, what are the green flags? How do you differentiate dating and fucking from poly? Is there a respectful way to get this deep early on in conversation, or is it just discovered with time?