My wife and I have been in and out of the lifestyle across our marriage and are at a point now where we’ve done the loud music and heavy drinking party scene enough. Nothing wrong with that—we’re just in our 50’s and looking for something else. She doesn’t drink at all anymore and I drink moderately if at all.

We’re looking for parties or other events where there is a sexy and sex-positive atmosphere but at least part of the experience involves time and attention to actually getting to know folks and have substantial conversations.

We really enjoy laughing with others in smart and reflective conversation. House parties are definitely an option though those have been hit or miss, and dating other couples in one-off dates can be a logistical heavy-lift and get pretty expensive where we live.

We’re considering multi-day hotel takeovers, thinking that the daytime would be a chance to really connect with other folks, though the one time we did a multi-day event most folks were hungover most of the day and mostly came out to party at night. Cruises are of course the ideal because of the long stretch of time and we’ve done two of those, but they’re outside our budget for a good while now.

We love atmospheres in which she can wear super sexy/slutty clothes and we can be flirty, make dirty jokes, etc. but also have “head fun” as well as “body fun.”

Would really appreciate any suggestions or thoughts folks might have! 🙂