My wife and I just experienced our 1st MMF because it was her turn. Now I picked the guy and everything she didn't ask for it or nothing. Well needless to say the guy comes over and he is bigger than me. He is a good 8in and I'm pushing 5. When we 1st started before getting naked and knowing how big he was my wife grabbed his shit and smiled and gave me this look. Now in my mind she gave me that look because she was excited to be fucking someone with a bigger piece. Now my wife tried everything to make me feel comfortable communicated, asked permission and even stopped in the middle to pull me to another room and talk. I kept telling her I was good and we can continue. I couldn't get hard during or even after it was said and done and just kinda of kissed her and sucked her tittie. She needed a release after the situation and we tried and my shit still didn't get hard she asked me to eat her I did but definitely was not into it all and she even stopped me and said that she can tell I'm not feeling it. Well fast forward a couple days and I still feel the same. I don't feel like I'll be sexually attracted to her anymore. I guess where.im going is his shit made me feel like less of a man. Now my wife tried to give me the same bullshit that most wives do with their husbands. Saying my size is perfect and it's not about the size but the connection and a bunch of other shit that just made it sound like she was trying to protect my ego and basically saying yes I do have a small penis but its ok because of all this other stuff. Now I'm over here tripping on her and myself and I feel bad because she didn't do anything wrong. And these.past couple days have been rough and I think I may have developed penis size anxiety. I have been doing nothing but reading on penis size and all this and I have never been the one to feel inadequate or less of a man. I'm trying to shake back but man that shit is just playing over and over in my head. The guy was respectful and not pushy and even has been trying to talk me through it and tried to reassure me that the feelings are normal and that we just need to communicate with each other and said maybe the lifestyle isn't for us. He said he could tell my wife really loves and respects me from the way she was trying to communicate and get permission to do it before hand. I just feel bad because my FFM was a great experience that we all enjoyed. She didn't get the same in return and now I'm feeling some type of way. We've been married 14 years and I feel like our sex life is going to be changed dramatically. I needed to vent and try and see if I could get some advice from this community. TIA and I hope y'all have a blessed day and rest of y'all's week.