My first experience was a club 2 years ago. Horrible. Only played with each other. Single guys prowling and lurking. Didn’t try again for a year.

I’ve been doing this a year now. First full swap was bad. I was having a bad emotional night. Took one for the team. Felt poachey. Their play style didn’t match ours, they liked separate, and it felt deceptive, they were FWBs, who rarely slept with each other.

We’ve been going to clubs. I (M) enjoyed being an exhibitionist, parallel play, had FMFs. But this felt disingenuous. Like we were unicorn hunters, not swingers. We aren’t, but I had self doubts that I would enjoy seeing a man penetrate her.

We’ve been inactive for the past few months. Friend reached out on SLS. They were attractive. Had a lot in common. But they wanted soft swap FWB and I wasn’t interested. I don’t like to flirt, see someone flirting with my partner, and kissing as a stand-alone activity feels too intimate. The guy slid into my partners DM on IG without asking, and I basically told him to fuck off because I felt it was disrespectful.

We went to a house party last night. My first one.

To say I was nervous is an understatement. I (M) wanted to make a good impression, but felt like an impostor. I wanted them to like us, but never had a good full swap experience, so I was nervous.

At the party, everyone was socializing, im an introvert so felt emotionally drained, and forced myself to bear down to go the play area. And holy shit wow.

Before we knew it, we group played with an attractive couple, full swapped, and kicked off an orgy. I banged several hot women, watched several guys take my partner from the back, and afterwards reclaimed her and had some really hot sex while we recounted our nights.

It felt very very validating. I now truly feel like I belong here. Just that I’m into debaucherous, dirty, group play bachanalian Roman style orgies. It felt great. Really looking forward to the next club or party experience, and I’m on cloud 9 with a big confidence boost. And my partner had an amazing time too. All the guys she played with made sure she had a cool time and were super cool with me too. Happy I stuck with it.