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How to communicate you are not comfortable with what your partner is doing with another in the moment after initially agreeing to it
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My bf and I are VERY new to swinging. We went to LS club a few nights ago and set boundaries at the beginning of the evening. However, while playing with another couple my bf started pinching me because he was uncomfortable that I was doing something we initially agreed upon was ok. I was annoyed that he was pinching me instead of whispering on my ear or something.

What is a better way for him to communicate or me to have asked him for “permission” before acting on it.

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If my hubby pinched me, I’d slap his hand away then go back to what I was doing. That’s not communication. It’s just being annoying.

Next time he needs to say “Let’s switch for a bit.” Or “Give me that ass for a second.” Then he can whisper to you about the issue, but pinching you like a twelve year old playground bully is just weird.

And you already had permission. That’s what boundaries are: permission as to what you can or cannot do.

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1 year ago