Recently while playing with another couple, it brought on a bout of jealousy that I’m having trouble shaking. My wife and the male half of the other couple did absolutely nothing wrong, respected all rules and boundaries agreed upon. While playing my wife and he were so in sync that it was actually quite beautiful to watch and there was so much passion involved that even though beautiful, got me all caught up in my feelings. Not sure why. We entered the lifestyle to have amazing sex and that’s exactly what happened. Maybe I wasn’t ready to see that? Has anyone else been in a similar situation and have any tips etc on coping with this?
It's happened to me, and it's happened to Hubby.
The best advice I can give you is not to let it spiral into an argument or a week-long joust of passive aggressive silence.
You need to express those feelings to her in a thoughtful, non-accusatory way, and she needs to reassure you that she loves only you, and that sexual pleasure is a separate, lesser commodity. It's OK to say "I need a little reassurance today."
And vice-versa if those feelings ever arise in her.
All of our feelings exist for a reason, and we can't unpack and heal those reasons if we can't openly discuss the negative feelings that bubble up to the surface.
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This is wonderful advice, and being able to admit insecurities is a quality that I really admire in people.
I've felt the same way many times.