Had a great weekend just gone. Long post but includes our journey so far, a general club review, and description of some personal issues I've overcome and our play at the club.

Personal background My wife (34) and I (36) were celebrating our 10 year anniversary. 19 years together, 10 years married, secondary school sweethearts. Both bi, some group experience when younger, before we had kids. We've been slowly exploring swinging for a couple of years; slowly as we don't get much time without the kids. So far:

• wife had solo play with a couple that we were close friends with, then we did some really fun bi foursome stuff with them on a number of occasions, but then learnt why you don't swing with friends when things got a bit weird.

• wife had another solo experience with a single male friend, one off, was hot.

• we did a lot of online chatting and planning that didn't amount to very much, although we did manage to organise parallel play, building to soft swap with a couple that was hot.

• went to the old hellfire club about a year ago, very quiet night, did some public play and let a single guy grope and cum on my wife while I played with her. Finished the night in a blaze of glory scoring a younger couple with a single male partner to go back to the hotel for a CRAZY 5some that remains our best experience so far.

General review Anyway, all that said, we've now been to this club a further two times, each time with a weekend pass. General observations: - very clean, safe atmosphere. - normal single guys around obv, but not THAT many and pretty respectful. - crowd is between 20-70, with the bulk being mid-30s to 50 but quite a few older and younger. Some diversity of culture/race but mainly white crowd. Mostly straight (not seen male on male yet). A few crossdressers each night we've been. - very friendly staff and management, Si in particular is lovely and fun. - music is mixed, general party music not too special, although best music so far was last night with some garage bangers - facilities are good. We've used dungeon (master chair, bendover stool for spanking and fucking) chains with restraints, private rooms well stocked with lube, condoms and cleaning stuff and blinds for varying levels of exhibition, On The Air room which projects action into the cinema. Lots of dungeon/public play options, gloryhole, 7 rooms of varying privacy, dark room. - relatively laid back vibe with a lot of people usually upstairs chatting and play not really kicking off until later. - Friday night is always notably quieter, almost too quiet but would be good if you were really nervous. Dungeon night was the busiest Friday. Saturday is much busier.

Personal notes and thoughts After a quiet but nice first time at the club a year ago, we were keen to go. So around a month ago we went for a weekend. Friday was a dungeon night, Saturday was All Bar None, a more general kink night. Friday was quiet and we enjoyed meeting some nice couples to chat. A few played in the dungeon which was interesting to watch, we did a bit of public sex in a room with a peephole, but I was nervous and struggled to maintain erection with people watching, but did play with my partner in public a lot.

Saturday was VERY much busier, with a lot of really sexy people. Saw multiple spanking and BDSM play in the dungeon, and a lot more public play, including an incredibly hot 6some on one of the big public beds. Sadly though I was really in my head, and struggled to connect with potential playmates. My wife was full of beans and excited, but was worried about me not being into it, so we only did some public play and I really struggled to maintain erection. I compensated by showing her off a bit. Bent her over one of the stools in the dungeon and publicly fingered and spanked her, which she loved.

No fault of the club, but, due to me feeling nervous and a bit overwhelmed, that weekend was a bit of a failure. I left feeling a bit disappointed in myself and had a confidence drop. I spent ages thinking and chatting with my wife on how we could make it better. Was worried that, as a bit of an introvert, I just wasn't made for clubs.

So this time, we went with the following plans: 1. Personal prep = Cialis. No sex the day before. Edging in the lead-up.

1. Do some drinking! Before I had been sober. I was driving, and was worried about whisky-dick. But as my dick wasn't playing ball even sober, I thought best to try to loosen up. Only had a few, never felt drunk, but was much more at ease and relaxed.

2. Fake it till you make it. Just make conversation. Smile, eye contact, ask questions, laugh. Don't be scared and shut down. Be high energy.

3. Be honest and open. Tell any we want to play with that I may be overwhelmed and get 'stage fright', so that they know and my pressure to perform is reduced. Let them know that I am skilled in the art of the tongue and finger and will enthusiastically focus on thier pleasure if my dick isnt playing ball.

4. Play with wife early. Keep the fire going with public petting and oral. Start with low pressure encounters, like single guy MFM threesomes and go from there.

It was great. First night was very quiet, but we did meet a very nice new couple and exchanged details for future. No one there that we really wanted to bang, but did lots of public play and managed to maintain erection very well.

Second night, felt very comfortable. Chatted to a bunch of people and tried hard to be fun and interesting. Soon felt natural. Went downstairs and sat on the master chair while my wife gave me head. I was throbbing hard, so pushed her over to a kneeling stool and bent her over. Started banging her from behind and motioned to a tidy looking single guy. He came over and started kissing and touching up my wife. She took his cock out and stared sucking. He was hot, fit and attractive. After she came a few times we were starting to get an audience. Was spanking her and calling her a good girl while she took us both. Then handed the SM a condom and swapped places. He gave her 4 more orgasms while she sucked me off before he came. By that point there were about 15 people watching the show, with a few ladies masterbating their partners while they watched.

We got dressed. I was in a great mood, feeling horny, sexy and up for more. Propositioned a couple, but they weren't up for it, no Biggie. Then took my wife to the 'On the Air' room, which has a video link to the cinema room. Proceeded to put on quite a show: blowjob, doggie, her on top, finished with a couple rounds of oral for her as people watches from outside. Once we cleaned up, a group near the cinema came to congratulate us on a good show 😊 felt so sexy and confident. We continued to chat to people, and watch the hot stuff going on (some very sexy dancers, one woman taking a blowbang from all the single guys, etc). We went home very satisfied.

Next time, the main aim for us is to swap properly and make sure I get my dick in a new person. Top tips : network more at the start so when we are hype and horny we already have connections to draw on. Start early with public sex and single guy stuff - lower pressure and confidence building. Don't be afraid, be myself and practice our flirting!