Really lengthy for those that enjoy a lot of details. Or - skim by topics in bold for your interests. Contrarian views on: ages, resort comparisons, "Desire is Only for Couples", or way less sex than expected in those sections below.

Setup / Why Did We Go?

We are a couple - both with professional jobs, from a large US city. She is young 30s, he is later 40s but is regularly assumed to be significantly younger - 30s. Both are above average looks - definitely not perfect models. She’s natural, imagine a thicker athletic body with a curvy ass and big breasts. He's decent looking, average body, a runner, very well endowed. Both of us are very easy going - not loud or boisterous, charming when chatting. We started exploring things related to ENM a year and half ago - we have been to our local sex club and a similar parties. We are open to full swaps or other arrangements with the right people, but have limited experience due to post-covid world and our preference for genuine connection with others. We value the connection with people more than just having sex, and in that time have fully swapped once and had two threesomes, once with another man and once with another woman.

At the club we go to, it’s usually an hour or so of mingling before people head back to the playroom. We always play with each other, but don’t always feel comfortable enough to have sex with anyone else after a 20 minute conversation. After a lot of research we thought DRM would offer a lot more opportunity for meeting people, with less pressure and more time before engaging physically. We have always only considered same room, but discussed opening our boundaries a bit for this trip. We also thought at Temptation with her being a good looking, fun girl - we could pretty easily find interested guys for her. So our expected focus was on couples at DRM and singles at Temptation.

We booked 3 days at Desire RM followed by 1 night at Temptation. This was due to a number of things including resort availability, our limited ability to drink heavily multiple days in a row, and our preference for couples. All nights were about $700-$800 for both of us, and we just picked the lowest cost rooms thinking we’d be out most of the time. We had read DRM has more swingers and allows public sex in some areas, with full nudity acceptable across most of the resort. We opted for a night at Temptation because all of the reviews had said this was a younger crowd and more of a party. We had a choice between 2/2 nights at each resort but opted for 3/1 to give ourselves more time to meet couples.

Transport and Area

Landing, immigration, and exiting the airport was quick; maybe just over 30 minutes from landing to being in the car. We stopped at the convenience store at the exit for sunscreen, as it's cheaper than at the resort.

We pre-booked USA transfers for all segments and service was great, always on time, clean, and professional. There’s some traffic right outside the airport due to construction but still about 30 minutes from the airport to either resort. 40 minutes between the tbecause they are in opposite directions. Cancun is a bit more run down than we expected, until you get right to the resort or hotel zone. Both areas were generally safe.

USA Transfers was great - clean, safe, always on time - recommended.

Resort and Facilities

We had the deluxe garden view at desire on the ground floor. The resort is set up as a series of small buildings spread around - each with 8 or so rooms, and seemed to be a maximum of 2 stories. The grounds had nice manicured walking paths that were clean and generally quiet. A larger pool on one side, an outside lobby bar in the middle and a fairly remote beach bar toward the other end.

The pool is surrounded by chairs and beds you can reserve. These fill up fast so if you’re picky go early - we aren’t and got a seat or lounge whenever we happened to walk down. Nudity is allowed at the pool area but public sex is not.

There’s a roof top jacuzzi over the restaurant building that is big enough for maybe 30 people with an attached bar and beds surrounding it. Public sex is allowed there. It opens later in the afternoon.

There’s space next to the lobby bar (outside) where they do the nightly shows and dancing.

There's a club/disco above the main lobby with a bar and light up dancefloor and some seating around the area and a pole. The playroom is off the side of the club and has "leather" cushions big enough for maybe 10-15 cozy couples. Compared to the sex club we go to, the play room is much smaller than the capacity of the venue. It's generally understood that the main public sex area is the jacuzzi beds/bar area.

The daily progression is generally pool in the day. Jacuzzi at 4:30 for "meet and greet". Break for dinner around 6. Lobby bar show at 9:30 then the club, then hot tub until 1-2AM when it started thinning out significantly.

Overall, based on the rooms I’d say that the deluxe garden view is equivalent to something like a Marriot Fairfield. Mostly clean. Heavily repainted many times, various little things broken but none big enough to warrant a more full refurbish. Tile floor. Sparse amenities. It was kind of stuffy when we arrived so we kept the bathroom window and doors open often to air it out. AC worked well. We occasionally had ants in the bathroom.

Wi-Fi was very poor, cellular at the resort is very poor. You're probably not on your phone much in this environment - but with being away from families and still relying on messages to go through, an improvement would be very welcome. Downloading reading material or something while you are lounging is hard. I know in our room at times I was getting only 1MBps. So we would walk around if we needed data.

Service / Staff

The staff were universally great. At times there seemed to be more employees than people. Everyone is friendly, helpful, knowledgeable, and professional. Everyone we walked by greeted us or asked if they could do anything for us, and didn’t care what we were doing or wearing. No one stares, and they looked at my wife's face when addressing her, even when she was nude. Bar service was a bit slow though during events. Usually they needed one more person than they had during those times. Humorously we did get one of the security guys to break character. One of our theme outfits for her was a winner and he smiled and fist bumped me when she walked into the bathroom. Later that night she walked by in the towel after the hot tub she flashed him as thanks :)

Beach

The beach is really narrow because of previous hurricanes / weather so it’s only deep enough to still fit the beds there plus a bit extra walking room. During high tide you could get stuck or not be able to walk very far. The beach runs the length of the resort - maybe a 5 minute walk end to end. They said online they have kayaks and paddle boards and catamarans but the water has foam floating barriers a few meters out to block incoming seaweed - they didn’t have kayaks at all, and you couldn’t take the catamarans. You could snorkel in the limited space or stand up paddle board. We're mostly disappointed you can’t walk down the beach. It’s really nice to be able to disconnect from everyone else and the only option is to go back to your room.

Check In/Out Timing Logistics

We arrived at Desire around 8am, and we checked in then knowing our room might not be ready until 3. They took our bags and we had a pre packed “go bag” ready for the day. We were allowed to eat and drink and everything without issue- the staff actually found us by the pool around 1 to tell us they had a room ready earlier for us. This was similar at checkout from Temptation where we checked out at 11 and they held our bags until we left around 3. We ate and lounged more.

Clothing

People are a mix of casually clothed in the day time or naked. You’re fine wearing shorts or t-shirts, hats etc. You have to be dressed while eating but in the day that’s very flexible. Some people are mostly naked with a meshed covering. While eating that's not our thing specifically, as we don’t want to sit where some random person has had their vagina/penis/ass the last hour. Dinner is a bit more dressy. The average guy was in jeans and a button down shirt or polo. More or less dressy wouldn’t be an issue, no one seemed to care. Shorts would be rarer at dinner. Some women go “sexy” which may be a very revealing dress that you probably couldn’t wear anywhere else. Your normal favorite few dresses or sunny weather attire would also be fine.

Nudity

There’s no pressure on the clothing - but most people around the pool will be naked. Just topless was fine as well; wearing shorts or bottoms or shirts was fine also. We both burn easily so we went with more coverage in the day/pool with clothes and/or shade on and off, and usually naked in the hot tub later. We walked around with minimal clothing or see through except when eating or going to something specific.

Daily Activities

The daytime pool seems to be the center of activity for most people. It’s relaxed - people laying on beds or standing around in the pool. There’s some scheduled activities there but they were more a side thing that a few people did. Like various exercise things. Beach volleyball had a small following. Some games at the pool, and Friday was a foam party. People were a bit more engaged then, but again it’s mostly naked people hopping around in a pool of foam. The "playmakers" and dancers and hosts here are friendly eye-candy. It's super low pressure - they announce the activities and go about with whoever wants to. We wouldn’t say the playmakers really helped us have a great time. It's good they are there but they aren't driving the course of anything.

The jacuzzi opens up later and some people move there. It’s advertised as a meet and greet for new people but that’s sort of lost. It’s just a more relaxed / smaller gathering of people in a pool and drinking. Less people/smaller space. It's unorganized so no more conducive to meeting and greeting aside from what you make of it.

People seemed to break up for dinner around 5:30 and then start collecting around the lobby bar around 9:30 for the nightly show. It’s thematic dancers for 30 minutes or so and people migrate to the club upstairs for the DJ. The playroom is open anytime during the club being open. That goes until 12 or so and people migrate to the hot tub again until people go back to bed.

Theme Nights

Theme nights / parties were usually fun. Pirate and neon were both good. Decent crowd, drinking, dancing. We loved making costumes and showing them off and I'd say most (but not all people) are in something at least loosely thematic.

Friday was Latin Night themed and that very unexpectedly was dead. The live music outside was very slow, and the number of people was the lightest we had seen. Dancing upstairs in the club was better but it emptied quick that night; and the same was true of the hot tub after. We left each night by around 1 or so as things died down and went back to the lobby bar for food and water before heading back to the room.

Food

Was good. There's separate breakfast and lunch buffet restaurants. All the usual US based staples like bacon, eggs, French toast, plus a lot of other items - breakfast tacos and omelets made to order, fresh juices. For lunch they had grilled items and various salads, pastas, veggies and Mexican specialties. Plus - orderable grilled chicken and burgers and seafood. The chicken was always cooked perfectly. Amazingly so, in every form factor it came in. We've never seen such consistency. But most grilled items were almost always heavy with butter. For dinner there was the buffet again, as well as the Asian restaurant and the Mediterranean one (which required reservations - and didn't seem as hard to get as people seemed to make it seem). For dinner we found the Asian restaurant best. The food was a good change and we had the chance to meet some people at the large communal center table. The buffets are not very conducive to meeting people - but if you know people you could meet them at any of the available restaurants. At night after the restaurants were closed you could order pizza, BLTs, or tacos at the lobby bar. More off-hour quick snack options would have been appreciated. Alcohol was always offered at all meals and when you arrive at the resort and most everywhere. We debated if they just poured light or if our local neighborhood bartenders just pour heavy. We don’t drink much during the day or meals, and ingested so much soda and mixer in the first two evenings with barely any effect we just switched to a few mixed shots the last nights when we went out. That worked a bit better.

Add On Packages

We pre-booked (and paid) for the Photoshoot. The photographer (male) was really very skilled with helping to set up poses (you just follow their lead) and we had discussed when we met with him what range of photos we would do. Although we wouldn’t mind if he touched us to help move us into position - he was super respectful and never did - it was all by follow his lead. For us we did more boudoir style, some with just her and some as a couple. Topless - but they would have shot more graphic if you wanted. That took about a 1.5 hours - some in the room, some in the disco for different backdrops and some on the beach. A few hours later they had a slideshow and all the pictures ready to review (they have an office on site). He took around 150 usable pictures. I’m not sure it said online but you additionally need to buy the pictures in digital or print format and we had actually just pre-paid for the photoshoot. I believe you can buy individual ones for maybe $20 or so each, but they will present you with options for different packages and numbers of pictures from 35 up to 150. These start at $600 or so and went up to $2000. It can be pricier than what we saw online. We didn't really know any of that and the price tag hit us by surprise - and we sort of spontaneously splurged / were pressured into just buying the $600 one. Had we down selected pictures better we could have been fine with less paid individually. We also used a coupon from the resort and got a slideshow for free. The pictures are amazing - a few people asked there how it went and we gladly showed them off and people agreed they looked really good.

Our female half also had a normal massage which was good. This was not the erotic massage and we didn’t do any of the other experiences. We heard mixed reviews on some of them so read or ask around first but we can’t speak to them first hand.

People

To start - We've seen many times that the difference between Temptation / DRM / Pearl is generally a progression from younger crowd and more party to older crowd and more relaxing. Based on what we saw, we think the differences in attendance ages between Temptation and DRM were very minimal, almost inconsequential.

Age Range / Averages

Desire Range: 30 - 75. Average: Upper 40s / Lower 50s

Temptation: Range: 25 - 65. Average: Lower / Middle 40s

The bulk and average of people at both seemed to very solidly be "middle aged".

​

Looks / Attractiveness

This is completely subjective to each individual, and everyone likes something different. We’re just trying to help newer people with expectations. There is a very significant portion who have had very obvious plastic surgery. We'd guess significantly more than half. For sure the highest concentration of fake boobs that either one of us has ever seen. And a good amount of other body and face work.

Also - we've seen a bunch of people asking about body hair/pubic hair and people all saying "whatever makes you comfortable". However, for both guys and girls we'd say very near 100% were completely smooth. Specifically - we saw one single girl with a racing stripe - everyone else was completely bare - male and female.

Overall, most people are pretty average for their age range there (in a good way - if you think you are broadly within normal - most everyone there is also). We don’t recall seeing anyone we’d say was super attractive. There were some people there who I would say are the opposite though. But again - respectfully as that’s just our opinion. The other confusing thing - we’d venture a guess that most guys there were slightly below average penis sized. Based on our experiences - I’d say the majority were below average, 10 percent were average, and maybe 5 percent were any bit above average. That just struck us as odd and confusing. We've each seen some around in our lives so I don’t think our expectations were off.

Friendliness / Chatting

At Desire, everyone we chatted with was friendly, whether we started the conversation or they did. People are interesting and aren't just talking to hook up with you. We met a lot of great people and some we will keep in touch with after. As many reviews say (but we didn't find to be true) - no one ever directly asked us if we watch/or swap, or what our lifestyle status was. It was more natural in conversation about how long they've been coming here, and how they wound up here. There seems to be a group of the oldest premier people who just tend to stick to themselves. We did engage with other older couples and again - all were very nice.

I don't recall any conversations at all at Temptation - it was just an overall different vibe.

Consent

Virtually everyone was very courteous about touch. Some people will touch your shoulder as they chat (fully dressed like at a bars) so we're not counting that, even though it's an attempt to show affection of some sort. You'll see a bit more hot tub hand placement tests under water. Similar to above - like a touch on a leg or back. Giving you time to invite or decline further. We thought it might get a little handsy at the foam party in the main pool - but not at all.

(*Caveat- There was one guy who very consistently made unwelcome advances and touches and had to be pushed away twice by our female. We were naked in the hot tub and twice he tried to join our chat and basically sit on her lap. The male here doesn't usually engage, but was very close to escalating very clearly to him what no means. This should never have happened in the first place, and after the first time she pushed him away it for sure should not have happened again. Someone told us he's a regular and that's how he engages with his friends - but for sure that doesn’t make that remotely acceptable.) We are chalking that up to an individual - not the overall place or people.

"Desire Is Only Couples"

One other aspect we haven’t seen written about is how couples interact. At our “home club” you must arrive as a couple and single guys aren’t allowed in the playroom unless invited, and generally you are expected to remain as a couple. Here - yes they only book couples. But some of those couples may just be friends. Or a couple may be separate the entire time they are at the resort. So even though there are no single males there - in practicality that’s not true. There are a number of “single” guys or husbands/male partners out on their own. Some are aggressively scouting any woman that will take them. We saw a few single males out to dinner themselves, etc. We saw a few female partners that seemed miserable as their husbands were off scouting, which in itself is off off-putting to the whole vibe. On top of that, some couples are just looking to play separately. We didn’t really anticipate that in all our research - that a lot of the time we’d be engaging with effective singles instead of couples. We went in thinking we were a couple and we’d engage with other couples (our home club has rules on basically staying together as a couple). That was rarer than expected. For some people though - this is a benefit.

Less Time To Engage With Others

As stated above - we booked this thinking we’d have more time to engage with couples - hopefully before hooking up in whatever fashion. We thought - a few days - this should be great compared to the hour we have to chat in a club before the playroom and the 3 or 4 hours total we are there at a club. In practice, it’s not as much time for a few reasons. People are always checking in and out to the resort itself. Your full time there may only partially overlap with a potential match. Then, people like different things and may not do the pool each day or dancing or whatever you decide to do, and you may not see them again. People get tired and go to sleep, or you are in the same space but engaged with another person or couple. And then on top of that - the above paragraph explains that a lot of people are more out engaging on their own. So out of however many couples you believe you could potentially connect after you think you match - it's still probably less than that even. And some couples do always go the same weeks - so they may seem more like a larger group only interested in themselves. To be clear - Desire was much better for us for engagement - but wasn't nearly as much as our minds and reviews led us to believe.

Sex With Others

People in most reviews dance around this - but we want to be very clear and up front to help others set their own expectations.

We went in thinking this would be a sex filled vacation and we’d have the opportunity and experiences with others.

It never happened. Not one single instance over 4 days.

Every other review talks about how the number of swinger couples is maybe half the total (the other half being nudists or people who just voyeur or exhibit etc.) - and then maybe half of the people who would swap at all might actually be interested in you, and what was said above about more singles than expected. Whatever similar metrics you want to believe.

We don't think it's just that though. From what the regulars told us, that week was very slow. It was fully booked but there was virtually no action anywhere by anyone.

Very literally - the first night we were there we saw a couple in the playroom when we went to check out what it was like. During the foam party an older woman start or try to blow a guy at the pool which isn’t allowed and that was stopped. At the jacuzzi during the night, the most we saw were couples laying in the beds but not doing anything. We stayed until the numbers were dwindling, and no one we were interested in was there anyway. So virtually no sex at all by anyone.

We heard many stories of “when I was here last year there were always couples having sex and swapping”, "the beds were always being used" , "you could just say it was your birthday in the hot tub and people would line up to suck you" So - I’m not sure if we got really unlucky timing-wise or the resort is declining in how much activity there is. Ourselves - we were naked and playful and engaging in the jacuzzi and after the first night said we would just go fuck in the beds if no one else did - because it’s fun to show off and people would engage a bit more. But - with such a disparity in the crowd, and no one you are interested in around - there just was very little thrill and so we wrapped up each night with some food and went back to the room by ourselves.

The people we did meet that we felt we had a good connection with - didn’t work time wise. That was potentially maybe 2-3 couples. Maybe - we didn't overtly discuss with them. Just roughly gauging amongst the two of us. Usually someone was coming or going and we wound up not seeing them out again before either set left. To be clear - we went to just about every available communal activity - dressed up in great costumes - met people, had fun. But sex never happened and didn’t seem to for anyone else around either.

Comparing Temptation to Desire RM - Ages, People, Parties

Because we booked late and we are generally younger and the reviews said Temptation was a younger/livelier crowd - (and we couldn’t get as many nights at DRM as we wanted) we also booked a final Saturday night at Temptation. We are writing this part of the review broadly just as a comparison to Desire RM as presented above.

Every review we’ve ever read says that Temptation is a younger party crowd. However, the age difference is very minimal / almost inconsequential in our opinion. Temptation was predominantly an early forties crowd, it’s just the party games and such skew to a younger crowd where you see more of the younger people (late 20s or early 30s) engaging with the playmakers and activities there. If you look around while that's going on - there's not much difference in the crowd.

We went there thinking there would be groups of guys like bachelor parties and/or just groups out for fun. That was far rarer than expected. We thought we'd see what couples were around - and give opportunities for my wife to get hit on by single guys. Most people there were just sitting in a pool and were couples or larger mixed groups.

There were some very clear groups of swingers as well. People in this sub always ask if there’s universal symbols and the answer is always “no”. At Temptation and Desire - people are very happy to tell you they are. Custom shirts, towels, cups anything. They are there and obvious. "Unicorn hunter", "I heart DP", "it’s not cheating if I watch my wife/husband", etc etc. At both places, even if you weren't sure, it'd be a pretty easy conversation if you were at all curious and unsure.

Nighttime at Temptation we came prepared for fun and oddly this crowd was much slower than Desire. There was the neon show, and the dance floor is raised and not very inviting because it’s a 3 foot drop off to concrete. The dancing crowd was older and maybe the same total number of people as Desire dancing - if not less. And there were almost none of the 20s/30s crowd there. We guessed they all go out to clubs instead(?) Or overdrank in the pool during the day. People were yawning and very bored looking. We waited until close to midnight to see if it picked up, but just decided to leave and go ourselves to the clubs in the hotel zone instead. A taxi was much quicker than Uber. After all the above - seeing just a new part of town and people out was a trip highlight. We grabbed a drink and walked around that zone a bit. We came back as the Temptation “party” was wrapping up - it was mostly the same group of paid worker/dancers. Maybe it’s just a day time crowd that fizzles for night.

Comparing Temptation to Desire RM - Things Temptation Does Better

The rooms are better kept at Temptation (or just newer and more modern looking?). Not perfect by far (shower needed a much deeper cleaning as there was some mold around the corners) but closer to a Courtyard or Marriott level stay. There's the main tower building with rooms overlooking the pool, and then a few building off to the side. At both places we had ground floor rooms which we usually dislike but was fine here for ease of access - and maybe someone would come watch is fuck ;) (Which also didn’t happen to happen - people missed out!)

Food was better at Temptation. Because it's bigger, it had many more options. The food itself was better, and the presentation and plating was nicer at the Temptation restaurants vs the Desire ones. For both the buffets and restaurants. The beach and amenities are far better at Temptation. There’s a huge beach to walk around for a few kilometers in each direction. It had a lot more beach activities available - all the stuff DRM didn't, plus other places offering boat rides, jet skis, etc. a few feet away.

It is louder in the daytime, and is just topless though. There's swingers at both. DRM is probably easier to chat more intimately if that's your form of connection with friends.

Summary

Would We Return? Gambling on Fun?

After reading all of that - we are struggling to say we’d go back. We met some nice people. We could be naked at DRM and topless at Temptation. But none of the action that we heard so much about was around. Even if you want to believe the problem was us - every story says that there should have been much more going on and it just simply was never there. We did put ourselves out and chat in every opportunity we had and had a great time. The costs were kind of high for what was effectively a nudist or topless resort which we could have gotten in many other places. We wanted it to be more. Most likely at some other time in the future we will give it another go, but we were a bit disappointed that both places were slower than anticipated. We wanted it to be more fun and more action packed than it was. We are still hopeful there's more.

If you’re interested in any further details feel free to post or message!