So at this point we've been exploring all this wild sex stuff for a bit over two years. We started on Reddit, met our first couple on Reddit, and have made some wonderful connections and friendships with people from Reddit. Because we value genuine connection over "one-night-stand" type connections, we've been able to grow our network of local friends and have enjoyed hosting or co-hosting regular play parties with up to 60 people. We've been able to fulfill almost all of our fantasies in this realm and it has been super fulfilling and fun, most of the time.

However we've also had hundreds of dead end conversations on reddit and it still astounds me (m39 Los Angeles/OC) that as of this week we still get so many messages where people totally disregard our entire profile and put zero effort into trying to make a good first impression, and seem to have zero understanding of how human attraction works.

Obviously a lot of people enjoy the anonymity of reddit. I understand that for most people, they can be very active on reddit for years and never post one single picture of themselves.

However, if you're serious about connecting with people for sex, unless you're looking for the most desperate people with no standards for who they have sex with, then attraction is necessary, and knowing what someone looks like is necessary, and additionally showing that you have a personality is also necessary for a lot of people.

I can't express how refreshing it is when a couple messages us and makes it easy for us to decide whether there's basic attraction. This is what I'm calling "normal." They understand that attraction is a two way street and they're not here to waste our time, or their time. They were attracted to us because of our pictures and videos, and to the extent that they're comfortable, they're reciprocating that acknowledgment and open with a friendly message and a bunch of pictures (and not just pictures of their genitals).

Now mind you, there's not always mutual attraction and needless to say sometimes people reach out and send super wonderful first messages but the mutual attraction is just not there. It sucks but at least nobody wasted any time. (And of course we've experienced that too... Reaching out to another couple and being rejected... It comes with the territory)

On the opposite side of that coin, the only couples that we have built genuine connections with from Reddit have always opened with a wonderful first message, including many good quality pictures of themselves, and then were available to verify on video or with pictures.

Anyway, I guess this was sort of a rant, but thank you to the normal people out there who understand how attraction works.