I read here a lot of how sad they are but its been months and rationally ending my life makes perfect sense. I have destroyed my body, Im unfit and diabetic. so I cant donate blood or be an organ donor. Im on different kinds of meds for depression diabetes and preventative medicine for high cholesterol. I stopped working (on medical leave) and just helped here and there with family business. My company has a life insurance on me and that would pay off a lot of my family's expenses. My friends all but two are single so they have enough support system when I'm gone. I cant feel anything. I feel fine thinking about dying. The only thing that stops me is that funerals are an expense I dont want my family to shoulder and my mom is old and Im scared to give her something to stress about. my cat is a stray and loves to go out anyway. I dont feel saf, the shitty part of my life is over and rationally speaking, there is no downside to my life ending right now.