I’m going to attempt tomorrow night. I’m tired of waiting for some crazy accident. No one is going to make it better because they can’t. And that’s okay. I just want it to end. I’m tired of waiting to be okay/normal and not depressed. It’s okay. I’m ready

edit; if i am able to get home tonight then i will be attempting tonight but i’m quite drunk so i’m not sure right now. it doesn’t get better. life is fucking awful. and i want to be done. and my birthday is soon which means less anniversaries for people to be sad on if i die on/near my birthday

edit 2; i had fun. it was nice to be social and feel like i’m not a some kind of disease but i’m home now so i took the pills. idk if it’s anywhere near enough but i hope it is. it doesn’t get better even if i try to distract myself

edit3; i’m still alive unfortunately