Eventually, I want to find a long term monogamous dom to date and be married to. After looking for a while, I already feel like giving up. I know I haven't been through as much as some others here considering I'm 19 and haven't been looking for that long but I already feel so, so tired. I feel like all I ever get treated as in any of the things I've tried is an object for sex, even when I'm seriously looking. A fantasy, a concept, but never a person. I just want to be loved and appreciated as a person first before anything else, before all the kink and dynamics. I feel like it's impossible to ask for both of these things at once, and I hate it. Whenever I read a success story about someone finding their dom , I feel happy for them but then I wonder what I'm doing wrong. I truly do.