I’m going through a bit of an identity crisis at the moment and that I’m questioning whether I am submissive. Ever since I discovered BDSM and dynamics, I’ve liked the idea and felt like I am submissive but now I’m wondering whether I just like the idea of it and that may be the reality is a little bit too much for me or more than I thought it was going to entail and I’m questioning whether I am submissive at all or just like doing kinky things. There are times where I really struggle with obeying and giving up control. For example, when I’m unhappy or angry with my Dom, I want to just do my own thing even though there might be a rule or protocol on something. Sometimes he will give me an order and I will forget. I mean, if I really was submissive to him in my head I would be remembering that order and want to please him and I would follow through on it. I wouldn’t be forgetting that he had given me an order and I had agreed to follow it, right? It’s upsetting because I want to be what he wants me to be. I want to make him happy. I try hard to be what he wants. But he’s noticed that it’s not how I feel all the time. It’s only when I want to be; it’s only when it suits me. I know that people can be submissive in different ways and everyone interpret submission differently so I’m wondering how do you interpret, show that you are, think that you are, believe that you are a submissive person?