I'm currently single and have been for some time. For the most part I'm happy being single but it's made tending to some needs and exploring different kinks difficult. I've been interested in orgasm denial but have significantly struggled with the self control needed to say no.

In theory denial seems like it'd be enjoyable and an additional layer to my submission, especially as I already love edging. Yet even though I go into a solo scene fully intending to deny an orgasm, I can't resist when the moment comes. I think it'd be much easier if I had a dom to directly tell me no. In general I do much better with external rules than rules I set for myself. I think that's the main issue here. But I am happy being single so I'd prefer not to seek that out as a potential solution. Instead I'd like to try to build my control and willingness to deny myself alone.

I really could use some advice on where to start. So far just repeatedly trying the same things hasn't been going the best! Has anyone else struggled with self control and if so, how have you handled it?