If you don't know me, I guess the relevant background is I'm 44. I got clean when I was 35, after being a daily meth user since age 15.

It's funny. I think I wrote one of these for seven years, and eight years and there was a lot of sadness mixed with the accomplishment. This time things feel pretty good. I've had it halfway in mind that this anniversary was coming up for the past week, and was doing some reflecting.

One thing I used to do when I had a bad day was tell myself "hey, you stayed sober, that's enough". And I remember telling myself that a lot in early recovery. I remember sitting and telling myself "you're trying your best" in an attempt to soothe my sore feelings. These days I only have remind myself that I'm trying my best occasionally, and I think, in the last year I only had a day where I said "hey you stayed sober, that's enough" once, if at all. I guess even on my worst days, more things go right than just that anymore, which is pretty cool.

Life isn't perfect by any means. Some parts are great, but I still have trouble understanding people and feeling confident that I know how to connect with them. It's hit or miss for me, but that's ok. I've connected with enough people that I feel ok a lot of the time. Back when I was using I sure couldn't say that.

I don't really know why I'm posting this here but I guess if you read this far, I want you to know that recovery is possible. It takes a lot of work at first but after a while it takes less work and you get to spend more time doing other things. For me it unlocked a life that was never possible before and I am immensely grateful for that.

Take care.