22 days off, while a personal milestone, is just the start... I was on Adderall for almost 2.5 years at varying dosages—anywhere from 20 to 60 mg daily, with some episodes going beyond that—and added kratom toward the end. I made many attempts to quit along the way, but my record before this was always capped at 20 days.

One of the worst symptoms that kept haunting me during past quitting attempts was this indescribably overwhelming chemical loneliness despite being around good people. It would always kick in around 10 days of abstinence, along with other brutal symptoms like intense anhedonia, deep sadness, and endless crying spells. The longer I pushed, the worse it got.

This time, though, something feels different. During this current cessation from both Adderall and kratom, I haven’t felt that crushing loneliness. I don't feel lonely at all. I’m still fatigued, still depressed, still antisocial, and it still takes hours to get out of bed most days. But for a few hours each day, I genuinely feel like my old self again, like I can recognize myself (I'm laughing, enjoying things a bit more)

I’m sharing this to encourage others on a similar path: even an imperfect, gradual taper that I did before going CT might be a better strategy for some. Hang in there! Still a very long way to go but thanks for letting me share.