I’m 15 months sober and for whatever reason, I find myself wanting to throw it all away today. IV meth was my poison.

I had a really draining week at work. I’m stepping into a new role, and my trainer is impatient and rude. The work is really fast paced and I just feel so overloaded. I almost never get breaks to eat anymore.

I just really don’t wanna go through those early months of first getting clean again. That was so hard. And I’m telling myself that having a bad week at work doesn’t give me the right to throw my life away again. That’s my rational mind, but relapses are never rational. I’m hoping I can stay strong.

Edit: I booked a skydiving session for tomorrow to give myself a rush to look forward to instead. I deserve it. So excited!