Need tips or advice..

I’m a writer and honestly can’t remember a time since I chose to major in writing in college where I wasn’t on stimulants. Now that I have a new freelance client, I have this “bare” feeling when working that really triggers me. It’s like, I need that “sped up, heart-pounding” feeling to “motivate me,” even though I know I don’t.

The first blog I wrote for this company sober they loved, so I know Adderall doesn’t make me a “better writer,” but I’m feeling so uncomfortable during the process of writing because this calm feeling is so new for me. I find myself putting off writing out of this terrifying fear in the pit of my stomach about not being able to be a good writer without it (again I know this isn’t true but it’s how I feel in the moment).

I wonder if I need to switch careers until I get enough therapy to find ways to cope with these stressors or to find healthy ways face my fears without needing pills to “help.”

Has anyone else has this feeling after quitting and getting back into the swing of things at their old career that you’ve previously always done on stimulants? If so, how did you overcome the fear without stimulants?