More than 140 days clean.

I don't know if this is good or bad thing. I used to be able to cry for hours and hours too much under the medication (I took that during 7-8 years).... Now I can't cry. How do you get the emotional pain out when you can't cry? Like men used to do in the past?

I had an argument with the guy I like. I made the mistake of telling him about my medication and about getting off my medication because I had a carrousel of emotions in february when I started to quitting the medication. We had several dates from December to March. He ghosted me since March. He appeared again end June.

He has no respect for me and he proposes dates that he later cancels. He asks me for nudes and then cancels dates. It destroys my self esteem so I took the decision to send him to hell.

I weigh 50 kg, I'm not a model, he is hot yes, but I don't have to put up with these games when any other man would be more grateful to me.

I have emotional pain due to my low self-esteem and his behavior to me. And I can't let it go. I can't cry. I don't know what to do with that feelings who hurt me a lot. I don't know how can I manage this pain. I used to cry alone in the past in this circumstances.