Just hit my 3 months off adderall today and wanted to share my findings since this community was huge in motivating me to stop. There are many posts that continue to help me each week as I navigate PAWS and for that I am so grateful. Please feel free to AMA

Background - Was prescribed adderall in 2020 and took 30-60mg IRs daily for the past 4 years. I wish I had educated myself more before seeking it out. Felt on top of the world for the first year and a half, but then the good effects started to fade as dependency really set in. I felt like a zombie, had zero emotional control, didn’t sleep and couldn’t handle any minor inconvenience without blowing the fuck up.

The first month getting off was rough, but there is a light at the end of the tunnel. I know I still have a long ways to go, but the positive changes I’ve experienced only reinforce that I’m on the right path and never want to touch the stuff again.

Pros:

• I get 8 hours of quality sleep most nights. When I was on addy I got 4 hours if I was lucky
• Anxiety isn’t coursing through my mind and body from the moment I wake up until I go to sleep anymore
• I have a way better handle on navigating my emotions and dealing with negative thoughts, which has greatly improved my relationships
• Can be present in conversations with friends (mind not racing, can actually wait my turn to talk)
• ENERGY!!! This is a huge one. It used to be a daily battle to get out of bed before noon. Now I wake up around 8-9 with natural energy that I thought was gone forever
• Exercise - Used to have crippling anxiety about leaving whatever I was hyper focused on to go workout. Now I say fuck it and feel empowered to make time for exercise whenever I want.

What’s still hard:

• Motivating myself to do things I have zero interest in (including my job).

Don’t let this deter you though, it does get easier month to month. Just have to find new ways to trick your brain into doing the shit until you fully recover.

I’m still learning, but one piece of advice others shared with me that I want to echo is your fear of getting fired due to stopping is probably all in your head. I have imposters syndrome and still battle with this thought most days, but have come to realize no one is really gonna notice long as you meet your deadlines. If that means procrastinating and jamming work into 3 hours, do what works for you and your recovery right now.

• Coping with self image due to weight gain since coming off. Went from eating once or twice a day to being ravenous. BUT as my natural energy has built back up I’m finding myself back in a good groove with diet and exercise for the first time in 2 years.