This is my first time posting in here, so a little background would help.

• Gaming was taboo when I was a kid, only an hour weekly was allowed.
• Got my first gaming machine (laptop) when I was 21.
• Battled with gaming addiction / compulsive gaming for almost 3 years.

It all started when I had nothing to do, with extra cash in the pocket. Acting all around like the world owes me! stayed up all night, went the next day to a tech store and got myself a decent gaming laptop (since I was in college) and just installed any gaming platform you can think of (steam, origin, riot etc).

My brain at that point was just intaking too much, "wow man, now I have all these games options that I`m just a click away from!", "I have sooooo much to get done in here".

At the beginning I got into single player games, but there was something off "I can do more!" so I installed the most popular online game (League of Legends), played it for a while but the learning curve was so steep I decided to get away (unfortunately just for a while).

But LoL gave me a sense of feeling I`ve never felt before, so I had to replace it somehow, what did I do? I found OverWatch. An easier learning curve, ergo much greater sense of achievement. It hooked me so bad I would stay all night, skip classes, attend the other classes while following up the game and its e-sport on Reddit, order insane high-calorie fast-food while studying VOD replays, basically just do anything that would keep me soaked in.

Eventually I hit diamond (my friend boosted me from plat), and that sense of achievement is gone! no more crave, no more adrenaline when I play OverWatch, it`s as if I achieved a life calling with that game. But not for long.

Me regarding myself as a "Gamer" now, I seriously planned my glorious come-back to League of Legends. tutorials, stream, reddit, my friends who are good at it. it is now my sole-focus. It is a harder game, way more stuff to learn, and there was I getting more soaked in.

But right there, an important but totally low-profile trait emerged while playing lol. a real-life curse plagued my gaming world. Completionism, now i wanna get my mastery on all 150 heroes to 5 minimum! and more crazy self-oriented goals.

Eventually I gave up. But that behavior left something in my head, now gaming is no longer only fun, its work! I got to complete every single thing I get my hands on! And slowly but surely would turn game into pure non-fun.

I would go out less, ignore my academic responsivities, my girlfriend, my family and everything! Hey nothing matters as long as I`m there behind my laptop clicking right?

The maximum I was ever able to achieve in LOL was Silver 1! yeah, correct, with all that time investment all I could`ve achieved was silver 1, it kind of still hurts even when I`m writing right now.

That is where I moved into the crazy stage, summery:

• Delete League of Legends.
• Sell my gaming laptop
• Download some other game.
• Get bored, quit mid way, reinstall League of Legends.
• Buy a Nintendo, play a bit, get bored, sell the Nintendo.
• Buy a PlayStation, play, play, play sell the PlayStation.

At this point, I made some life changing decisions, like switching majors and cities. So I left my PlayStation back home, and was offered a brand new laptop by my parents in a given budget, and yup, instead of choosing a notebook I chose a gaming laptop.

Now, I have to point out that this was a turning point in my life, I stressed out a lot when I moved to my current city, specially with the current COVID-19 situation. But something was really different this time, I wanted to go out, meet new people, date someone, you know, do what a human my age would do.

I am fortunate enough to meet someone, I am fortunate enough to be studying something I am really into. But gaming is still not quite out of the picture yet. I was able to hit a spot where I manage game with my life where I game only after I get some work done, it would work then not work then work again ( I really don`t know how to express it)

And I found something really important, I should stop blaming games for what I did for the past three years. It was me, I was missing the sense of achievement from real life, scared to go out there and do something, got to a point where I don`t wanna do anything serious in my life so I can still come home and game, preferably if i don`t have to leave home.

I was vulnerable, games are there, went in hard, and it got me really hard. But it`s all good believe me, I had depression, sadness, emptiness episodes and all kind of crap but was able to pull through.

Another important thing I found out is that the worst thing you can do is plan to stop doing something, "I should stop gaming" WRONG, rather approach it by doing something else, "I should work no matter what", I am in no place to tell you what works best for you, but for me? that worked the best.

The days I would crave gaming less are the days I'm busy working, I would sleep without even noticing that I haven't played anything today. On the other hand, the days I would crave gaming are the days I'm just there doing nothing, then yeah one game wouldn`t hurt, as long as I'm not playing ranked it will never get back to me.

But I feel like I`m at a point where the simplest game I play will take it`s toll on my brain, and start to think and strategize about it for no sane reason.

And that is where I had to work on my environment once and for good.

• replace my gaming laptop with a light practical notebook.
• sell my PS when I visit home

Don't get me wrong, it is not my first time trying to implement this technique , I tried to execute it many times before, but guess what, I was just approaching it the wrong way, I will elaborate:

• the Old Approach: I isolate myself from gaming, and the moment I find myself bored, empty, nothing to do after a long ass day, what do I do? think about games.
• the current Approach: I isolate myself from gaming, and the moment I find myself bored, I start thinking what can I do? can I get out? can I call someone to hang out with? is there a movie I want to watch? is my girlfriend available? when was the last time i called my parents, where am I with the book I last purchased, what`s up with the NBA,,, oh and chess? and on and on

You see the point of isolating yourself is get your brain to think about other things you can do, if you isolate yourself just to get back to it immediately then you`re really dooming yourself in an infinite loop.

Think about what you CAN do, not what you DONT WANT TO DO.

I was able to get my body back in shape, my brain back on track and my life running back again. my college grades are as good as they used to be, putting plans for the future and actually enjoying every bit of my life.

The thing is, I wanna maintain the tempo, and I recognized a threat of me going back to gaming and don't want to risk it at all.

• Im finally in peace with me deleting my two LOL accounts.
• Selling my current gaming laptop.
• getting a laptop for pure work.

A point I`m proud about myself is: this time I don`t want my parents to help buy the new notebook I`m looking for. I wanna make it on my own, save up or work, add what I get from this laptop and buy it. The world owes me nothing, enough me sitting down doing nothing and expect someone to have my back.

Gonna keep working with my current laptop, zero games, up until I am able to get the new notebook. Got myself into chess and I will be perfectly fine.

One more thing I should mention; I`m not purging games out of my life completely. But I want to see totally recovery before I ever think about playing again, Sometimes you just got to stand up and do it.

I know what I want from my life, and will fight tooth and nail to get it! That is what I`m focusing on.

Thank you for reading. Peace!

Disclaimer: everything mentioned stems entirely from personal experience. It is not intended to be a substitute for professional medical advice and should not be relied on as health or personal advice. Always seek the guidance of your doctor or other qualified health professional with any questions you may have regarding your health or a medical condition.