1. Y'all are my church these days. I love this space.
2. I was having a great night-- super cuddle and smoke sesh that just hit right at every level up and down my chakras-- I don't even understand all that stuff, but man I was feeling right! Blissful, peaceful, loved. Then after my person was gone to sleep, I made the mistake of checking my email. Opened it to find out that, nope, I'm still a loser and the world is cock-blocking all my efforts to get back on solid ground again.

I'm thankful the weed has cushioned the blow, but man I'm tired of feeling this way. I've spent the last five years trying to recover from a 1-2 punch, and I'm not a young guy anymore. I don't have the luxury of time and energy that a twenty- or thirty-something has.

Everyone talks about alternate universes these days. In one of mine it's just me and my person cuddling and smoking. Sometimes I think I'd be great to be juuuust unwell enough to believe it was real, or enough.