You see most of us south asians living in western countries have to do that bit extra to be seen as worthy for friends, employment and women. We have to put extra efforts into out appearance, our social skills (via social exposure), put effort into side hustles and basically anything extra from the norm that will differentiate us from other white, taller and what society perceives as more attractive men. Many of my south asian friends here in australia didnt peak until AFTER high school. As in they didnt start working or have a gf until after they graduated. And I would probably be perfectly happy with that experience too. I dont really mind my ethnicity at all.

But you see the thing is is that for a south asian in a western country to be seen as worthy and likeable by society, you have to NEUROTYPICAL. It is essential. I am high functioning autism on top of being bald at 20, short (5 feet 5) and also not very attractive (many women have told me this). So now I cant effectively compensate for my lacking physical appearance like many of my south asian friends can with social skills because no matter how much social therapy I go through, it will not cahnge how my brain is structured and it will not cure my autistic tendancies and behaviours that are seen as extremely unattractive for hte majority of women.

I wish I could indulge in self improvement. I have so much fire in me to do so you know. To fight these horrible stereotypes of us being "unattractive" and "shy". I have escaped social anxiety but I dont have those natural social skills and intuition. And I feel so horrible now. Its like I was given no genetic setpoint from god to be able to self improve and bind with my masculinity. Like I said i ahve no social anxiety but I cant even hold a conversation with anyone without htem feeling cold and indifferent and trying to excuse themselves from me. I cant hold down a job because I keep getting bullied by coworkers. I cant make new friends despite all the attempts. And worst of all, I have never even made a single female friend my entire life. How am i supposed to feel masculine when despite putting more effort than anyone, I cant counter that one thing? AUTISM