Most of us know the value of community, especially when doing something that goes against the grain such as practicing nonmonogamy. Our discord server seeks to provide that community and support for our members.We chat about current events, food, music, tv/movies and all of the little experiences that make ENM great (and sometimes not so great). We are a social discussion and support group primarily, not a dating/hookup group.

About Us:

Community oriented – we’re an intentionally small, intimate, niche server where we seek to build real connections and friendships, despite us being online. It’s a ragtag, seat of our pants labor of love. It's a quiet little house party. We're looking for people who want to build such a community with us.

Diverse ENM backgrounds – we have varying levels of experience and styles of ENM (open, polyam, polyfi, solo, anarchist, you name it). All of us in the group are committed to ethical conduct in all of our relationships, with a variety of approaches

Supportive – we value everyone’s background and individuality

Active – we all have real lives and make the most of our chat time together

LGBTQIA / GRSM friendly - we welcome all, we have moderators and admins who are alphabet mafia members, and we accept feedback by taking meaningful action

About You:

Age 40 or over– (formerly 35 ... As our moderators age, so does the group) We understand the age limit may bother some, but there's something immensely valuable about having a community in which everyone is in a similar phase of life as you are. And everyone (mostly) gets your off-hand music and TV references

Actively practicing ethical non-monogamy, or in direct intimate partnership with someone who is – We all had to be new to ENM at some point, but our community is focused on those who are actively and presently living this life. Think of this like a group of ENM people having convos with their peers and friends, not a facilitated learning space or online educational resource.

Self-educating - Whether you are newer to ENM or experienced, we encourage you to be actively listening to podcasts or reading books that further your education. We often talk about the latest books and podcasts and what we've been gleaning from them.

Willing to take feedback well, grow, and learn - We are all continuously learning and growing, and we’re a community that respectfully challenges one another when it’s needed. We address racism, patriarchy, homophobia, etc. when they arise, because doing so is part of being in ethical relationship to others. That said, we lean pretty far left.

Respectful – Honor everyone’s background and relationship styles

Witty – Engage in our banter, and bring your own flavors of fun to the table

Active – You are looking for a space where you can actively chat, share, and add your own thoughts regularly. If you're interested in quietly observing, our Discord is likely not a good fit for you.

If this sounds interesting to you, join us here: https://discord.gg/szxaqFmwtd