My partner of nearly a year has spent at least the last two months avoiding a very serious conversation. I have found out secondhand what it involves, and my meta told me he point-blank told them to wait until after a month-long event to actually talk to me. I don't want to delve into too much detail here, but upon hearing some of what was said outside of my presence to my own friends, I feel like I have been lied to and used and never taken seriously. Commentary came up suddenly from my meta about how he never sees us all living together (solo poly, hasn't been an issue since day one), and was followed up by my partner with a rather catty "You know we aren't a real throuple, right?" Which, yes...yes I did. I have taken that as a joke for all the months it was brought up after my meta said it. Meta apparently also stated to my roommate that this was just a FWB situation that I just fell harder than I was supposed to in (which was not the case, so either he never accepted it or partner has made them feel like this is the case). The two of them are engaged, and it feels like they are closing ranks on me for whatever preconceived notion will justify the neglect and manipulation over the last couple of months (likely more, but it started getting incredibly bad in December). I am at a loss, and feel like a victim of hierarchy and insecurities within the relationship that is not mine. It's devastating. We're now at a stalemate as everything is hanging in the air and no one wants to make the first move. I have attempted to initiate discussions prior to all of this, only to have my own concerns brushed aside and told we'll talk about it later. It's sat too long now, I have no desire to repair it. I just want an explanation of why treating me like an object on a shelf was acceptable behavior.