This is my first post. My grammar is kinda waky but I’m 20F. Idk what to do, I lost my V not long ago it didn’t hurt because I have dildo got use to pain. Butt I wanted to feel what is sex life since I haven’t got in a relationship in a while got very horny and pleasure myself to cope with it. I talk to a guy who older than me 29m or 28 forgot his age exactly. At that time I was 19 about to turn 20. And we talk in text it was okay getting to know each other and later talk dirty stuff and send pic I send like 3 and got very honry. That when we decided to meet up somewhere we bought condom and head to hotel. I was nervous at first seeing the hotel room and join him to go to bed cuddle and make out and clearly I was hell horny and began to grind on him we make out and had sex but I got tired quick it felt good. It felt fast but got tired and end up cuddling I didn’t blow him he wanted but he didn’t force me. He bought me food and sleep till are time of the hotel end. My fav part he was good at sucking me kinda miss it lol. He told me had past relationships so he know to have sex. But one day we wanted to meet up and accidentally slept thru and miss his call and text and got nervous debating to go, we agree to fuck but he was getting desperate want to see me that I got scared and ghost him. He try to reach but haven’t text him. So idk what do to been a month and half that accident. I’m lowkey scared to reach out but the same time it keep me remembering that time and get me horny to do again but never reach out. But the same time I feel like he probably talking to someone so I guess it better not to reach out since I was the one left him delivered.

:)