Background: My wife and I are swingers. We have sex with a lot of other people, especially her since we do a lot of gangbangs. We also practice heavy BDSM in our personal lives. This has given rise to three types of sex.

1. Lover sex : this is the most intimate and romantic. We have sex a lot but this is hands down my favorite. This is what most people think of when they say “making love”. I whisper things to her, play with her breasts, kiss her. She pokes me, ruffled my hair, bites my ears. We giggle my teenagers as we play with each other.

2. Slut sex/ sex toy sex: this is where I treat her like an object. I will slap her, choke her, call her dirty names, spank and whip her, even piss on her. She will kiss my feet and lick my toes and behave like a sex slave. Sometimes we will involve other people if we are doing CNC gangbangs, but mostly this time is for us. Needless to say, everything is consensual, even the CNC part, though in her words if she is in slut mode the word consent is meaningless. We will sometimes shift from lover mode to slut mode and vice versa depending on our mood. Sometimes she will want to be hurt and ask me to treat her like a slut, sometimes I will ask for it.

3. Casual mode: this is one where neither of us are feeling overly romantic nor interested in getting into slut mode (which requires aftercare, cleanup etc). I will approach her asking for sex. She will just open herself up and tell me to get going while doing whatever she was doing. She has had major conversations with friends while getting fucked like this. I have done the same while getting sucked by her. We have had major arguments while fucking each other.

Which brings me to why I am writing this. Since Friday night or Saturday morning she is unable to find one of her Tesla key cards and she is convinced that I lost it. I keep telling her that I have the app on my phone but she is not willing to give in. So the sex we have been having over the weekend is the angry casual sex where we are arguing yet sucking , kissing, fucking each other 🤦🏻🤷😝