I was a late bloomer among my female peers, and felt like I was the last to lose my virginity. I was never very feminine, but I've always been attracted to men. When I was 18, I found out that people can transition the other way (previously I was only aware of MtF), and remember seeing Loren Cameron's book in a local bookstore. I was like "wow! It's possible?" Then I found out that there's all kinds of surgeries I could have done, but they didn't seem like anything close to the real thing, and in my mind the world was very black and white. I didn't think gay men would be satisfied with me without the surgery or even with whatever the surgery could give me.

So I benched the idea. Decided to just keep doing my thing and made up for a lot of lost time sexually when I started college. I like men, and men mostly liked the body I already had. Curvy goth girl with big tits and a thick innie pussy who is down to try just about anything.

Then I found myself in a chain of long term relationships all the way into my thirties and ended up in kind of a dead bedroom situation. I can count on my fingers the number of times I had sex in my entire 30s, but we always blamed it on not wanting to get pregnant.

During covid lockdown, a lot of us kinda sat with ourselves and had these major revelations. My understanding of the world expanded and I realized that it didn't really matter who was attracted to me if I wasn't happy with myself. I started testosterone and was immediately thrilled with the changes, except I found myself victim to this whole new insatiable horniness that I hadn't experienced in decades. At the same time, my partner was realizing sex was never an interest or priority. Oh fuck.

After two miserable years of trying to deal with the problem solo, we finally came to an arrangement. This year has been slow just due to chaos factors, but that first year I really got to enjoy myself. I had partners from 20 to 46, and was propositioned by guys in their 70s. I'm not saying I wouldn't, but when you've been without dick for as long as I had, you're not in the mood for someone to just eat you out because of ED.

The hookup that has sort of held me over during this year's dry spell was a threesome with two college guys. Easily the most beautiful bodies I have ever had the privilege to experience firsthand, and the first threesome where I found myself in the middle with a cock in both ends. It was truly a beautiful moment in my life, and this has felt like an honest do-over for me. If they did see me as a woman, nobody ever said so or made me feel that way.

I'm looking forward to what the next year has on store.