In relation to my last post, I haven't done anything with anyone for almost two years after my bad first sexual experience. I believe that I am now ready to have sex and have learned a lot about myself after that bad first time. I'm very envious of people who have many sexual partners and have a lot of great sexual experiences to talk about here. To be completely honest, I present myself as very conservative, "religious," shy, and timid to the public, so I don't think I'd be able to have a one-night stand with a stranger. The men who have seen my body online always comment on how much they like it and are surprised by my lack of experience. In public, I dress very modestly and am almost completely covered, so literally no one can see even the outlines of my curves. I would like to keep both of these sides of me very separate. I'm not ashamed of either, but I have decided that I should allow myself to explore the slut side of me that I have never explored. It has been quite difficult for me to find someone I'm interested in. I have canceled meetups because I'm too scared they're not genuine and guilt or have had great conversations with men I have found unattractive. I like to think of myself as not picky, but some men have switched up here when plans haven't worked out, making me hesitant and unmotivated. I would love to have a tall, kind, considerate, mature man as a sexual partner, but I haven't been so lucky. If I had multiple partners, that would truly be my fantasy fulfilled.