I had few relationships while i was still in years 18-21, my main reason for getting in those at the time was friendship, but mostsly really wanting to have sex for the first time.

I had been dating two beautiful girls G, after her was D. But none of it really led to us having sex…

I was obssesed to fuck somebody really bad and losing my virginity. So at (19) i met R(18) who was known to be a little of slut, and social butterfly party type girl, and you could really tell she was “easy”. I knew i had the chance. So after couple months maybe, it happened🥰 in the summer , middle of night, at the beach while we were having an overnight party.

Since then i kinda proposed to her the idea of being like boyfriend-girlfriend. To which she agreed. But later told me, she didnt expect it, and thought it would be one time thing. But i wanted to keep fucking you know. And also kinda developed feelings for her.

I had sex with her for some times after; but later had to go study long distance. One night she went to some random guys party, which i was not ok with, and i think she fucked one guy, to whom she later developed a relationship , started family and had a baby. So we broke up couple months later.

Year after , when i was (22) and back from long distance, we managed to endup in one party, and got down together. Met up couple weeks after and i fucked her. She had bigger ass than i remember. They were on brake at the time; but not long after they got together again and he bred her. After i fucked her i realized i cant love her, and be with her, and have to let her go. It was hard kinda. But i kept imagining and masturbating alot after that whicl helped me.

To this dayim 29now, havent fucked a single girl again. But the whole cheating dynamics behind previous experiences, led me to discover cheating subreddits, cuckolding and hotwifing, stag and vixen, swingers and ethicsl non monogamy.

This made me realize how big of inpact she had for me, and i may have had a chance to practice all that with her, but ruined it st the time, because of not knowing its a thing, and getting jeolous and mad over her for liking other guys..

Alot of details left out, but it makes me want to start a new relatio ship now with someone who is open minded about all this lifestyles of being open, and being free to have sex with whomever we want. Aka i would love to be cuckold with a hotwife.