I don't remember every situation or event that occurred while I was drunk of high. Sometimes I remember just pieces. I know I was raped many times. I only posted details of events I remembered. This post is talking about the three men, who were married to women I was really close with. I do remember occasions vividly that I was raped, some of them violently. I don't care to post those, please don't ask. I do remember others that started with me saying no, but I ended up really enjoying. There were a handful of guys who I remembered preferences for and tried to please them. There were a few more guys that I actually pursued after having done things with them. Nelson encouraged all of this and likely got paid for everything that happened at his house.

I had coworkers that I was really good friends with. I did a lot of things outside of work with them and they were really good friends to me in some dark days. My husband worked odd hours at the time but my friends would often bring their husbands to events.

Rick was married to a girl I shared an office with. She and I were really close and talked more than my husband and I. Rick was at Nelsons house for a party. I was extremely drunk this night. It was late in my tumble down the rabbit hole that was my affair with Nelson. What I remember about Rick was that he was really nervous and needed help. I remember he kept asking if it was okay and if i wanted to. I know it took some convincing to get him going. I don't remember much about the sex or him in general but Rick did cum inside me.

Casey was married to another girl that worked in a different dealership, but she also partied with us. She knew that Casey was interested in me because he told he he was attracted to me. As soon as things started coming out about the affairs, she confronted me with out having any confirmation. She had a feeling that Casey had slept with me. I lied, but it all came out anyway. Casey, again at Nelson's house. Tried to make sure I wouldn't recognize that it was him. but once we started having sex, he couldn't help but show who it was. He wanted me to know it was him. I remember him being girthy and having him make me cum. I remember him cumming in my hair when he tried to cum in my face and I tried to avoid it. I remember him not being done after cumming and making me lay down again. I don't remember much more than that.

Brandon I do remember a bit more about. He was married to one of the sales people in my office. She also partied with us and we always had fun. It was a close knit group of girls. She was really hurt by the whole thing and was the first to file for divorce, blamed me for it. Brandon tried to be romantic about the whole thing. We were drinking together. He tried telling me that his wife was okay with it as long as we didn't talk about it. I got so drunk he had to carry me. We went to Nelson's room, I don't know if Nelson was there or not. Brandon carried me to the room, I remember feeling like he was strong. Laid on the futon with me, ran his hands in my clothes. We made out a bit while he fingered me. I remember that it felt good, He took his hand and put it on his penis that he pulled out for me. I was so drunk I didn't really fight it nor know what i was doing. I remember that he moved me to the side of the futon matress and got on his knees on the side of the bed. He fucked my mouth and it made me throw up, which he let happen on the floor, Tried to comfort me. Got back on the bed and ate me out. Then crawled on top of me, I remember him asking if he could fuck me. I know I said yes. We had sex, I don't remember much of his penis but it did feel good enough to make me cum while I was drunk. I remember him telling me how much he loved my moans and that he was gonna cum. I told him not to cum inside me. He did anyway. I remember him leaving me on the bed with my shirt and bra pulled up to my neck so my boobs were exposed. I must have passed out, i remember waking up to someone kissing me, biting my neck, sucking on my nipple, fucking me, and cumming inside me. Had no idea who it was. I woke up again with a blanket on me, still leaking cum from the two men.

I ruined many relationships and friendships. I was part of many broken marriages. I was hester prin from the Scarlett letter. We would run into these people at the grocery store, school functions. I was so ashamed of what I had done. It helps to talk things out sometimes. It hurts a lot less now. I just had a long drive with my husband where he let me vent to him. This was one subject that came out and I thought I would share.