As I write this I look back and thing how did this all happen? What got me into this lifestyle? How did I go from an average straight man who loved pussy to know a confused and conflicted maybe a secret sissy who glorifies and worships cock..

It started for me with an ex girlfriend. She would tell me during sex how much smaller I was compared to her ex’s and how they were so much bigger than me and filled her in ways I couldn’t. It was so humiliating but it was such a turn on knowing that she had had better cock then mine and the only way I really was good at pleasing her was with my mouth and going down on her.

Fast forward to where I move across the country and she is now my ex. A parcel arrived at my door with some flavoured lube, a long slender dildo, and a cock cage. I was so surprised and confused and not sure where it came from or who but I was instantly hard.. that’s when my phone goes off with a happy birthday text from said ex. She asked for my address before I moved and it didn’t seem out of the ordinary as we still talked frequently at that point.

She told me it was from her and she wanted me when I was free and alone to put on the cage, and FaceTime her. So a few hours pass and after figuring out how to lock myself away. I got everything I needed and face timed her.

She answered and asked if I was locked up? I said yes, she then asked me to show her which was followed by a “good boy”

The praise made me hard in the cage and that was just the beginning. She then ordered me to taste the flavoured lube and show me just how obedient I would be for her..

Without hesitation the lube was in my mouth and the dildo was down my throat gagging as I had never had anything in my mouth aside from pussy before..

She then praised me again and left the call.

She would text me a few days later telling me to wear the cage and be alone in my room. I waited for her text and a video of her being fucked by a massive cock was on my screen. I was instantly hard and reminded that my cock who was willingly self locked away was turned on watching her be fucked. She moaned my name and asked if I was jealous before the video came to an end. I sat there frustrated and confused but more than anything aroused.

This was the tipping point for me. As time went on it was watch this hypno, dream of this, think of me being railed by a big cock.

My thoughts ran wild and the obsession with cock still remains to this day. As I self lock and dream of that birthday gift years ago I wonder where she is and what she is doing. If she only knew the impact this had and what I would do to see those video and have her demands fulfilled again.

I wonder if the years of watching hypnosis and being obsessed with cock has made me this way or was it the praise and appreciation from her knowing that doing all these things made her happy and pleased her in ways that I just couldn’t with my cock.

I write this locked away as a horny confused secret sissy 🙈