A few days ago, I made a post about how much I hate myself, how depressed I am about my sissy and porn situation, and also about my limp dick when trying to have sex. I got a lot of good and bad responses, and I want to thank all of you who texted or commented. Since then, I’ve stopped masturbating and consuming sissy porn—at least up until now. I still haven’t jerked off, and it’s hard as hell.

Like I said, I got mixed feedback. Some said to stop completely—stop porn, stop jerking off, which is what I’m doing now. But others said it’s just who I am—a sissy, a sub boy. They had really good arguments. I do like the thought of being dominated, fucked, maybe even used, I don't know. I like the pressure against my prostate, I like chastity, girly clothes—everything. But as soon as I cum, I hate myself so much...

Now, I’m not sure what I want. I’m so confused about what to do, and it’s all just too much. Sissy stuff and porn take up so much energy and thoughts—especially now, after I stopped jerking off. I’m super horny all the time.

Today, I was on Reddit or HypnoTube, looking at some stuff, and I touched myself. I got so insanely wet. My thoughts were super girly, and I just accepted it. I kinda loved it and felt slutty and girly. My hole wanted to get fucked... I’m so lost right now. Of course, I stopped after realizing, but the horniness won’t go away, and now I feel constantly girly.

Maybe I should give it another try, or will this feeling go away if I keep resisting for more days? Maybe I should try to get in contact with a sissy or a helpful female dom? I’m really not sure...

Would be glad for your advice.
Thanks for reading :3