At the start of the year I facilitated a workshop deep diving into power play dynamics. I started by setting the scene and we talked about many different types of submissive personalities. I acted out body language, dialogue and described possible scenarios that each type might find themselves in. I described a Princess type writhing and moaning in bed and asking their love to touch or please them. Either directly or by talking about how much they wished someone would touch them!

After we talked about types of sub, our relationship to subing and a normal day impression of the idea "to submit" I could feel we had relaxed into the topic together. After a great discussion about boundaries and limits I set participants into small groups to dive into boundaries together. The excersies was simple and some groups kept it clear, some went in a playful direction with lots of laughter, another group sat closely and spoke quietly to each other.

After a lunch break and some fresh air, we went into negotiation tools. I emphasised the importance of negotiation and demonstrated what it can look like and how it can serve us. I could see the sparks flying in the concentrated, listening faces taking notes around me. When I sent people into pairs in a negotiation exercise I could tell the topic was landing. It was hard to break up the conversation to move on to the next part!

After a long day of intense information and sweet vulnerability I could feel the energy in the room drop in the late January afternoon. I made another pot of tea and changed the lighting in the room. I had planned for this low energy part of the day to be when we talk about aftercare. I used many examples of possible requests someone could make. I tried to be varied in requests for physical, emotional and practical comforts to give a broad spectrum for examples. I was clear and specific about this being an essential part of BDSM play.

If this sounds interesting to you I will be running another How to Sub workshop in Studio LUX this weekend. Check it out and feel free to PM me if you have any questions about the day :)

How to Sub - Sunday May 19