I (26M) had always been nervous about buying toys. What if someone finds it? What if I spend too much money on it and it disappoints me? What if I like it so much I can't stop buying more?

Two weeks ago that finally changed. I bought a fetish toy via Amazon and it's been one of the most positive developments in my sex life to date. I enjoy it without shame: I can relish using it without worrying about how anyone will react. I'm still finding new ways to use it. I can take care of it--clean it, store it, and treat it with respect--and it feels like a meaningful investment.

It's not going to solve every frustration, and it's not the fulfillment of every fantasy. But it's an affirmation of what I like. I look forward to learning more about myself through it, and having a lot of fun while I do.

I bought another toy I was previously too shy to and between the two of them I can finally approach masturbation as a treat rather than a compulsion. I will update anyone who's interested on how my feelings toward and relationship with these toys change over time, if they change at all.

What was buying your first toy like? What, if anything, did it change? Since your first, have you changed the way you buy and use toys?