I don't have much going on anymore. Lust is something a bit confusing so I left it to others I think so that I can be less of a problem to myself. There's not much to feel emotionally when guys find me attractive like in my adolescent age when I could get high on hormones; they seem to feel it, but I don't feel the same much anymore. Sometimes there's no choice but to look for some company from somewhere as I lack it about everywhere and have no one to stay accountable to. Even if there are a few I care about, I would let them down in my second life because that's my old habit that kept me in the dark all these years.

Last posting got neutral support, so I deleted it. Sometimes the cold machine of sensible conduct deletes the love I have to offer here in support for others. My habit of routine has loosened by much this year. Walking a dangerous path between vice and pride is a treacherous venture few can make right without hurting those nearest them.