It's been years of good recovery but (in hindsight) I've been working towards full blown relapse in the last few weeks.

Watching porn, creating anon reddit accounts, joining dating apps, etc... to my personal credit there was no in person meetings, but it was clearly headed that direction.

Years ago i was going to SLAA meetings, achieved 3 years of actual sobriety, and got to the point where i felt i could function on my own...

I have a new wonderful partner and I came clean to them this morning. Surprisingly to me I did so without lying and attempting to cover my tracks or worse.

At the end of it I feel ashamed and pretty low. I don't know how it's going to turn out and I just wanted to get it off my chest.