So for context, I'm 22 weeks pregnant with my first baby, I've been off of T since May of last year. (I plan to get back on after birth). The past few months specifically has been REALLY hard on me dysporia wise. I don't have the accessibility to LGBT friendly OBGYN's in the area. So getting misgendered from my doctor is something that happens on a daily basis. Not just by my doctor, but with staff. And since my pregnancy and higher estrogen I'm constantly getting misgendered when before hand, it rarely happened.

So.. here's where I don't wanna sound like a dick.. I have a close friend of mine, she's Trans as well (male to female) and I love her with all my heart. Lately since moving away to a bigger city she's been getting a LOT of gender euphoria from strangers constantly gendering her correctly. Compliments, etc. I am happy for her, I truly am. But in a way I almost feel jealous because when she calls it's the ONLY thing she talks about. Multiple times, multiple calls a day, it's always brought up. Again, I'm happy for her, but she also knows I've been struggling lately with dysphoria. I don't know how else to describe it besides saying it hurts me a lot emotionally. I've tried to gently bring it up and mention that I'm happy for her but I'm currently feeling a lot of dysphoria so it's a hard topic right now. She will say something like "I'm sorry" but will then basically brush over it and go right back to what she was talking about.

I can't help but feel like an asshole for feeling like this. But it also bothers me that it seems to be the only topic of conversation even though she's aware how dysphoric I've been feeling lately. Again, I am happy for her, I really am. It just hurts.

I should also note that I am working on getting back into therapy for at least my depression, I'm on anxiety meds but my Dr decided against antidepressants as they make me extremely suicidal. T so far has been the only thing I can take to help with my depression