I knew I was getting more mature when mailings from AARP started asking if I still feel okay

I kid, but my life insurance company has stopped sending Christmas cards.

I don't feel old, but I keep hearing my favorite songs playing in elevators.

Oh, you didn't come here for the monologue?

I'm 64, permanently separated, and operate my business from Las Vegas. I am relaxed, friendly, and occasionally entertaining. I am ambitious and hard working. I have a highly questionable sense of humor. I know this, because whether it is actually humor is frequently questioned.

I am looking for a mutually beneficial friendship that is authentic and enjoyable for both of us. I am seeking a smart, organized and ambitious woman for an arrangement grounded in affection. In case it isn't obvious, what I seek is something with a bit more gravitas than an occasional "let's get together and party." My idea of an ideal arrangement is one that looks a lot like a caring relationship, with communication, dates, and a lot of laughs, if you can tolerate my sense of humor.

I will take you seriously as a woman, and I will ask you do the same for me, hopefully as a man. Goals.

I am in Las Vegas, and it would be helpful to this endeavor if you are too, or travel here regularly. I heard they have gambling and sports activities here, so it is not a terrible place to visit.

If you're wondering what I like to do, I made this handy list: cook together, go to Red Rock Canyon for a drive and hike, watch a movie, hit up a casino, go shooting, go to a Raiders game, listen to some music, look at some art, or go on a photo shoot out and about somewhere.

Am I handsome? Well, when I was born, the doctor held me up by my feet and slapped my parents.

I went to a shrink once, I said, "Doc, I feel like I'm ugly. What should I do?" He made me lie on the couch face down.

But I clean up well.

And let me leave you with this quote:
"The main problem with the Internet is that things are not always exactly as they appear."
-Abraham Lincoln