This will be a long, weird post. I do not anticipate getting a ton of responses; so, if this post is still up, I’m still looking for you. I’ll keep reposting every week until I find you.

Tl;Dr: I’m looking for a pretty, smart, kink-friendly younger lady I can become romantically-involved/obsessed-with-her, so I can finish the damn novel I’ve been writing for 2 years—and co-create new projects, if you’re the creative type.

Quick About Me (RE: count the 🚩):

First, I am polyamorous (polygynous, technically). I have a nesting partner (27F, bi); more on her, later.

Physically, I’m a man in my mid-thirties. I’m 71” tall, weigh approximately 200lbs , and my dick is 8” long (uncircumcised). I’m fitter than most men my age, more hirsute than most, with a salt-&-pepper beard and a head I keep clean shaven. I get a lot of “zaddy” comments, even though I’m still not 100% what the fuck that means. I’m attractive and athletic, though by no means am I everyone’s cup of tea.

Personality-wise, people say I’m funny. People say I’m smart (I get called a ‘genius’ a lot—not something I believe), and people say I’m charming (this, I believe). I think of myself as pretty temperamental; I’m prone to fits of melancholy just as often as I am hypomanically-charismatic. I’m very lazy, and have been accused of having an executive functioning disorder. I like to think I’m more playful than serious, and more earnest than superficial. I’m former military, but I don’t have the PTSD to match. My day job is in medical research.

Hobbies-wise, not many. I go the gym six days a week, blaring music that makes conversational impossible. I read. I write. I play the odd, occasional video game (obsessively, for days on end). Oh, and I love to cook. You will be served my overly-fussy recreation of a rustic Milano pasta al bolognese, my nearly-custard brioche French toast, or my chicken breast rose-hip pan sauce which is to die for.

Heart of the Issue:

I need someone who can be my new muse. This is more involved than it sounds.

I am at the tail end of writing my second book, first novel. It’s a book that I think has social importance beyond my own ego, and something I have been writing (seriously) for the last three years. The whole structure is mapped out; I’m not having a ‘ideas’ problem, or the conventional version of writers’ block.

Writing and storytelling is the better part of my soul but, unfortunately, my soul is rather appetitive. Without some extrinsic drive, it’s easy for me to let projects and ambitions languish. Over the past year, work on my current project (my second book & first novel) has ground to a halt. I am missing the ambition and drive that limerence gives me.

Historically, when bourgeois men run into this problem, they turn to the uncompensated emotional labor of women to solve it. And, like: who would I be to laugh in the face of generational inequity? Hence, I need a muse.

What I’m looking for:

Necessary Requirements - Someone I can be obsessed with (or ‘fall in love with’, whichever happens first). I am drawn to naturally exceptional ladies—the ambitious, socially gracious, or otherwise exceptional. If that’s you, I’m likely yours. - Single or poly-sapphic woman, 18-24. I want to be at least ten years your senior, and can only handle being the sole romantic male in your life. - You need to be pretty. Plato says “the beauty is the path to the good and something something”; I am vain, and shallow. - Please be smart. The smarter the better in whatever strength you cleave to; smarter than me would be optimum. - I need a talker. This is a hard requirement. When my brain gets tangled up in knots, I need you to untangle it with your words. Eloquent rhetoric and sincere rambling are equally as acceptable; just talk. - I need you to be minimally nurturing by nature. Someone who is available, and tolerant of clinginess if I develop any towards you.

Non-necessary preferences * This is a stretch for an already slim demographic I am looking for, but I very much hope to find someone who also like to be a writing partner/co-writing with me on some future projects I have ideas for. This is not necessary, though; it’s just a nice thought. * I prefer if you are more on the extroverted/assertive side of the social spectrum. I love introverts but when I get internal, I need you to reach inside and draw me back out. * Attitude: I like both princesses and tomboys. * Bonus points if you are bisexual or bi-curious and want to date also my nesting partner, but it’s not a hard requirement (from either of us).

Location notes:

I’m currently located in California, and am moving back to NYC sometime before next summer. I’m open to you being wherever, as long as there is a plan/roadmap/clear opportunities for physical contact.

What I’m offering:

• Multimodal relationship. I’m open to anything from “temporary arrangement where I can lust/love after you and you reciprocate just long enough for me to finish my creative projects” to “pseudo romantic creative partners” to “unconventional semi-conventional girlfriend-to-marriage pipeline”. My nesting partner claims I am, quote, “the best boyfriend in the world and terrific in bed”. She is clearly lying, but there’s that.
• I’m mildly entertaining, kinky, and loyal.
• Depending on the duration, I’ll probably end up immortalizing you in one of the creative projects I am working on. So like, there’s that?
• If you’re into/interested in FFM threesomes, my nesting partner and I are looking for a permanent to semi-permanent addition to our lives. (Throuple/closed triad preferred).
• My complete and utter devotion as I develop a deep and abiding emotional dependency on you, pushing me to create and grow in ways hitherto-now incapable, becoming anything from a) dotting Daddy waiting on his princess b) slavishly loyal knight hopelessly devoted to you, or c) enthralled pet whose world revolves around you.
• Occasional back rubs.

Please DM me if you’re interested. I know you’re out there—I just need to find you. Hopefully, soon.