It would probably be really slick if I were going to write some hail-mary missive here where I pretended to know what is in your head and heart already, but I’m not that dramatic or religious and you’re not that dumb.

Cool?

Cool.

I’m a genderqueer, ethnically non-monogamous 42yo AMAB dominant. I’m an avid cook, decent baker, multi-instrumentalist, singer-songwriter, audio engineer, woodworker and tinkerer. All that is to say, I’m rarely bored or boring and very good with my hands.

I live with my spouse/nesting partner who is also ENM. Definitions get messy here, but we practice kitchen table polyamory and do not have vetos or make decisions about each other’s relationships.

To make this difficult, I genuinely dislike video games, CGI superhero movies and most of popular culture. Definitely some curmudgeon with a heart of gold vibes here.

I’m looking for a service-oriented, masochistic, submissive Good Girl ™. Assigned gender at birth/genitalia/biological sex are all unimportant, but leaning femme-presenting probably is. Age is not particularly important, but it is essential that you know and can articulate your wants and needs, even if you’re still exploring.

I am looking for someone close that I can create a beautiful long-term power exchange dynamic with. I am looking for someone that needs to serve others, feels fulfilled having their clothing chosen for them, and enjoys chastity/orgasm denial and edging, bondage of all sorts, breath play, impact play and the gorgeous intersection of tenderness and sadism that I have to share. You need to be in/near Santa Cruz or excited to come here weekly. I’m happy to talk online initially, but this is an in-person situation.

I want to put you through very difficult situations and tell you how proud I am of you.

Intelligence is sexy. Ability to hold a conversation is sexy. A dark sense of humor is sexy. Self-sufficiency is sexy. Being able to think for yourself is sexy. Life experience is sexy. Surrendering control and having your collar jingle as you do chores with a plug inside you and ankle irons on is very, very sexy.

I look at power exchange as an actual exchange, and I don’t just mean that as I get to spank you and you get to be spanked. I want to create order, rituals and accountability in your life. You want to serve and feel a sense of purpose, be that through physical suffering, mental privation or washing dishes at a party where you’re wearing latex and gagged the whole time.

Write me something interesting.