Me (29F) and my partner of choice (23F) have had sex under the influence of multiple substances, and we’ve never had an issue. However our last experience has changed things.

We invited over a close friend of mine to trip with us. Shrooms and codeine together is our favourite, so all three of us took a dose and drank while we waited for it to kick in. My partner and my friend got to know each other, and even started kissing and touching without me (that’s a good thing.)

We all went to the bedroom and got undressed and started fucking. My friend and I were awake(ish) and present for the whole session, and here is what we remember happening:

All three of us were in a triangle of giving head, all active participants. After that, my partner lay on her back, and I started kissing her while my friend lubed up her pussy. Then he started fucking her. I moved to sit on her face, and felt her lick my clit while I made out with my friend. Then, I lay down in the 69 position to eat her pussy, while he moved his cock into her asshole. She was very clearly tongue-fucking my pussy and asshole, I remember feeling it. He said he was going to cum, so I instructed him to cum in her ass. He did, then we all lay back and fell asleep together.

What my partner remembers:

She remembers all the same things, up until I started kissing her. She remembers telling me "stop, I’m not feeling good" before I kissed her, and then getting very sleepy and everything going black. The next thing she remembers is waking up with a very sore asshole, not knowing what happened.

Now, she’s been crying to me and going on and on about how she feels violated, that she didn’t consent to that, etc. I’m just so bothered by this, because how could I have known? I was barely there during the session, but I distinctly remember her participating long after the point she claims she "fell asleep." On the other hand, I can see how that would be a terrifying experience for someone.

I don’t know what to do. Any advice?