I dont even know how to navigate religion anymore. I'm the only person in my family that's had this shitty, abusive experience with religion with my parents and it's starting to piss me off and it feels like no one cares. not my siblings, therapist or anyone here. there's already so many things I've faced in life (you can look through my post history for that) that brings up this sense of shame, awkwardness and other bullshit when I tell other people but at least some care. but with the religion thing it's like it doesnt mean shit or much of anything cause oh you just can't say anything bad about god!! I'm sick of all the christians in my life, most of them are on some weird annoying shit one way or the other and I'm fucking sick of it. only person I feel safe talking to about it is my best friend and I really wish someone here would talk to help me through what I said on my last post

I don't even hate religion. I'm agnostic and I'm still open to the idea of god maybe existing. and I can't stand the athiests who try to rudely, arrogantly force their beliefs on people either. I guess I don't know anymore what to think. I thought I was solid in my beliefs but idk anymore I just feel sad, frustrated and lonely