Hello, cardfriends!

My 39th birthday is coming up Nov. 29, and I could use a hand from some of my RAoC pals.

I think I'm normally a pretty upbeat and nice person. I grin like a dope in pictures, I hug stuffed penguins, I humor demanding cats. I put my grocery cart back. I put other grocery carts back. I send cards, like, a lot of them. Also penguins, I give away a lot of those. I work a lot, which is arguably NOT a positive, but I make websites and college textbooks accessible to people with disabilities and differences so at least it's doing some good?

But. The past few years have been... A Time. My mom, who lived with me my whole life, passed away in 2019, which was especially huge because my dad died back in 1993, so now I'm an "orphan" at the time a lot of my friends still have parents who are just hitting retirement! My wife and my three sisters were what got me through that, and earlier this year, I left Pennsylvania, where I'd lived my entire life, and moved with my wife, my son, and my best friend/housemate/ex-husband/son's dad to Arizona, to be near my wife's parents. But! My wife then moved to Washington state, said she needed to find herself, and requested a divorce. We're still friends, or trying to be, but... like, yikes? I went from what I thought was an incredibly tight-knit family surrounded by relatives and friends-who-were-like-family to a lovely but weird house collective, a lot of time with my soon-to-be-ex-in-laws, and having my sisters across the country in Florida, where they have all now moved. The absolute icing on the cake was that my favorite cat died a couple weeks after my wife moved out, which is also when our solar panels ripped off our roof in a freak windstorm and we found nesting black widow spiders in the little grotto thingy in our swimming pool. I'm also trying to switch jobs, figure out my now-on-my-own finances and be part of deciding whether we want to stay here or do something else - but, uh, what? No idea. Oh, and right, there's a whole pandemic and stuff.

I said on Twitter that I would like to have a strongly worded conversation with the writers, because there are ENTIRELY too many plot lines here. The spider episode was especially egregious and should never have made it out of workshop. :)

But it isn't all bad. I've made some new friends - including a bunch here and on RAOA - and joined an awesome just-starting-up karate school that's allowed me to be an assistant instructor, and sent the aforementioned crapton of cards (and received almost as many!) I've interviewed for new jobs that I'm crossing my fingers for, I've gotten more confident doing certain things alone, and I've lost like 30 pounds.

That said, my birthday is not exactly looking exciting. The people who kept up all my mom's birthday traditions with me after her passing, like birthday pie crust, won't be here. My housemates (son and his dad) are lovely humans, but not what you would call super-affectionate or into ... feelings? So I need to do something new and different, something that perks up this pengin for real!

Which is, of course, where you come in.

Please send me some happy mail! I've already gotten some cards that I'm saving, and I think I might do a livestream of me opening them, so you can have the joy of watching me grin like a dope ON CAMERA, and so that I can have sort of a virtual birthday party with people from "back home" too. And you're all invited, because it'd be cool to show them not just mopey, dopey me, but happy, beloved-by-carders-everywhere me so they know I'm not just a sad sack ALLLLLL the time like I sometimes come across when they text!

As cards go, I like just about anything, though penguins are a rather easy "big win" if you like. Owls, Pride/rainbow-themed things, cute monsters, capybaras, the beach/ocean, fat cats (especially black ones) and things I can make even more cards from are always a hit as well. Handmade, store-bought, that weird card you can't find ANYONE to take off your hands? It's all great.

If you want things to write about, tell me good things - anything you saw or experienced recently that made you happy, no matter how small. If you REALLY want to make my birthday special, BE a good thing for someone and tell me about that. (That's one of the traditions I'll be missing this year. My wife and I used to try to "out-give" each other for our birthdays and Christmas, instead of buying presents for each other.)

Pay it forward in the McD's line or smile at the harried cashier when you're shopping or hold the door for someone with their hands full, and send me the story on a card! I'll be so excited, and maybe this year will feel more like a "rebuilding" one instead of just a "ah, crap, everything's falling apart" one!

I appreciate all of you. If you have my address, send away; if you don't, feel free to let me know if you prefer chat or message and I'll get it to you!

And, if you made it this far, please enjoy photos of the world's dumbest cat and of my 3-foot-tall stuffed penguin, Hoogerheide!